Sacrifice
by MissLucyInTheSky
Summary: Set during New Moon. After Edward leaves, Bella decides to give into Jacob. When Edward unexpectedly returns, a tragic event will happen, forcing him to make a difficult choice, changing both their lives forever. He must turn Bella to save her life.
1. Return

_Everything was tinted a deep green. The forest was dark, unforgiving, forbidding. Fear washed through me in waves, but I continued on. I wasn't sure where I was, how I got there, or where I was going, but I knew I had to get there. I stumbled, tripped, and fell countless times. I felt the pain from falling, but it didn't stop me. Before I had knew it, I was there. A clearing of trees, fallen logs, bushes…It was all so familiar, but I couldn't think of why. Then I heard it. His voice. Calling for me. It was velvety soft. Beautiful. "Bella." Over and over again he called. I looked everywhere, desperate to respond, but I had no voice. Every shout, every plea was silent. I dropped to my knees. Wrapping my arms around myself. About to concede defeat, But at that exact moment, he stepped out from behind a tree. Smiling. Welcoming me back into his arms. Saying my name. Edward. _

I sat bolt upright in my bed, dripping with sweat. Sweat? That was unusual for me, but this dream, was also unusual. It was not like the others I had been having these past few months. Well, they were the same nightmare really. Reoccurring. I couldn't really describe what happened in it. All I knew was that, in the end, _he _always ended up leaving me, broken in the forest, and I always woke up screaming and unsettled. No, this one was much, much different. It wasn't a bad dream at all. As usual, _he_…I still had trouble using his name, was the star of my subconscious. But in this dream. He wasn't leaving. He was _returning._ I pressed my mind to remember, exactly, what had happened. Had it been a premonition? No. That was silly. I wasn't Alice after all. But, I still had an unsettling feeling. In the pit of my stomach. Moving up to my chest. The hole. I had thought too much about him, and it was catching up with me. I held my sides, trying desperately to breathe normally, but it came out in gasps.

I pulled myself back together, almost literally, with the thought that I _had_ moved on. Just like _he_ had wanted me too. As of recently, Jacob and I were official, as he liked to call it. I thought back to the memory of that night he had asked me, no…begged me to move on. To give him a chance. So I agreed. But, to me it felt like more like a concession. Like I was giving something, or someone up, rather than gaining. I felt guilty just thinking about it. I knew I was a horrible person. Of course, I loved Jacob, that wasn't the question. Did I love him more than…I gulped…Edward? Or did I just convince myself that it was time to move on. A part of me felt like I only accepted because it had been _his_ last request of me. It had been what he had wanted for me. The fact that Jacob was a werewolf and therefore, the sworn enemy of the vampire family I had loved so much mattered little to me now. I accepted these mythical stories like they were perfectly rational. Like I wouldn't be shipped off to a mental institute if I mentioned it to anyone else. If a unicorn had pranced into my backyard, I would have welcomed it to stay and thought nothing of it. I was messed up, that much I was sure of. I sighed heavily to myself, now fully recovered. I looked at the clock. It was already nine-thirty. It was a Saturday, so I had permitted myself to sleep in, until after Charlie had already left for his bi-weekly weekend fishing trip. This weekend, he brought Billy with him. It almost seemed like they _wanted_ us to… But not, I pushed that thought aside. Charlie hadn't gone crazy, after all. He was just relieved that I was finally back to normal. Or as normal as I was every going to get back to.

I got out of my bed, grabbed a change of cloths, and hurried to the tiny bathroom that I shared with my father. The shower was refreshing, after waking up doused in my own sweat. I made it fast however, wanting to call Jacob, and see what he had planned for us today. He always had plans….always keeping me busy. I guess it was a good thing. I finished blow-drying my hair and put on my clean cloths. I had picked out a fairly thin long-sleeved top, blue, and light jeans. I was glad that the weather was unseasonably warm for April. As I descended the stairs and turned for the kitchen, a feeling stopped me. Maybe calling Jacob could wait. I had the sudden urge to return to an unhappy place in my memories. The place from my dream. Surely, it had been long enough by now to return to the place where I had last seen _him_. Where he had said goodbye to me. Where he had left me. The dream had had a strange effect on me. I suddenly _wanted _to revisit this place. So, just in case, I grabbed a coat from the hook next to the door, and walked out, heading across the street to the worn trail that led me to the clearing where, a little over half a year before, I felt like my life had been ended. In a way it had been.

I stumbled over the tiniest rocks and twigs as I made my way slowly. I cursed my clumsiness on several occasions during the ordeal, but I refused to stop. It took less than ten minutes, before I stopped suddenly realizing I was here. There was the tree he had leaned against, as he had told me the things I'd never wanted to hear. And the trees he had disappeared into afterwards…where I had tried to follow him, tired to stop him. Of course, it hadn't worked. His mind was already made up. I sat down on a newly fallen log, amongst the green. Trees, bushes, brush, moss…everywhere, moss. It was so green, it made my eyes hurt, so I closed them, putting my hands in my head and resting that way for a moment. Letting myself be swept up in the sounds of the forest. The chirps of birds, the whistle of the wind through the ever-green trees, the crunch of brush under foot….? I lifted my head. Someone else was near. And then, he was there. Edward.

"Bella?" My name sounded foreign spoken in the velvet smooth tone. A voice I recognized all too well. The one voice I had tried to forget.

"No…" I shook my head, disbelieving. I refused to look at him. To confirm what I had heard. My mind reeled. Who else could It have been? I tried to find an answer, desperate now. Then the tears came. Rolling off my cheeks before I had a chance to fight them back. I shook my head more vigorously as that impossibly sweet smell found it's way to my nose. I shut my eyes again. But I heard another tentative step come towards me. The silent tears continued.

"No…You're not here…" I stated. "I must have gone insane." Moments passed. I didn't move. My heart sped up when I stopped trying to refute the irrefutable truth. He was Edward and he was here. Standing before me. I looked up reluctantly, and he was holding out a cold, hard hand towards me.

"No, Bella…You haven't gone crazy." Did I detect a hint of a laugh from him? I would have been angry if I hadn't been so shocked. "I'm really here. I-I realized….I can't stay away from you anymore. I know, that I promised you…promised that you'd never had to see me again. But….God, Bella I'm such a selfish creature." His hand flew up to his head with inhuman grace, and he shook it lightly. "I couldn't leave you. I love you. Please….Please, Bella don't cry….I'm so sorry. You have no idea." His voice chocked off, like he didn't know what else to say to me. So, I stood, unsteadily, and threw my eager arms around his neck. Burying my face into his ice cold chest. The feeling was so familiar, yet so foreign at the same time. He loved me? How, in any plane of existence did _that_ make sense? I let the tears flow more freely now, soaking his button-down shirt. He stroked my hair, just like he used to, trying to comfort me, though I didn't know if that was possible.

At that moment, the world began to spin around me. My head felt light. _No_! My head screamed at me. _Don't you dare! You will NOT miss a minute of this!_ The screams in my head continued, but I couldn't react, it was too late. I felt myself slip away. Everything went black. The last thing I remembered was a pair of strong, gentle arms, wrapping themselves securely around me, keeping me from falling.


	2. Explanations

_(Edwards' POV)_

_I stared at her wide-eyed from behind a grove of pines. My Bella looked awful. She was quite possibly even more pale than she had been before my leaving. I could see the blue blood pumping through her veins, sustaining her life. Her eyes had sunken into her skull slightly, as if she hadn't slept well in months, light purple marks underneath them. She was terribly thin as well, looking as though she had lost at least ten pounds, if not more. Her hair had lost it's shine. Her beautiful face had no color. She looked so terribly distraught. I didn't want to believe that my absence had been the cause of all this physical devastation, but I knew that it was and I hated myself for it. I saw her sit down on a log, not even twenty feet away. She was so close. I had come this far. I couldn't turn back now. I stepped out from behind my cover and took a few slow steps towards her. I went silently at first, but decided when I was about ten feet away that I should give her some warning to my presence. I purposefully crunched some leaves underfoot and broke a twig. Her head lifted slightly, but her eyes would not meet mine._

"_Bella..?" I took another step closer, waiting for her reaction. _

"_No…" Was all she said. She shook her head. Did she think I was a hallucination? I guess I couldn't blame her for that. Now there were tears rolling down her perfect cheeks. __No, please don't cry, love…_ I thought to myself as I waited for her to continue.

"No…You're not here…I must have gone insane." I wanted to laugh, if the situation hadn't been so serious. She was actually doubting her mental health. I had to prove I was real to her.

"No, Bella…You haven't gone crazy. I'm really here. I-I realized….I can't stay away from you anymore. I know, that I promised you…promised that you'd never had to see me again. But….God, Bella I'm such a selfish creature." I slapped my forehead lightly before continuing.

"I couldn't stay away from you. I love you. Please….Please, Bella don't cry….I'm so sorry. You have no idea." I cut myself off before I overwhelmed her.

In the next instant, she was standing, albeit shakily, throwing her arms around my neck. I was shocked. I didn't think she would even want to talk to me, much less touch me, but I returned the embrace nonetheless. She was obviously delusional, this might be the last time I would get to hold her. She was sobbing more freely now, I could feel the warm moisture penetrate my shirt, and I reached my hand up into her mess of hair, running my fingers through it, trying to soothe her. She quieted a little, her tears finally running dry, but now she was wavering back and forth in my arms. I could tell she had lost consciousness, and she started to slip out of my arms. I caught her gently, sighing to myself.

Of course. It was just so…so Bella to pass out on me. I hadn't even had the chance to properly appreciate being in her presence again yet. I hoisted her light, limp body into my arms, pausing to brush her hair from her face, and wipe away a few remaining tears before they dried. I wanted so badly at that moment to kiss her, but that might be inappropriate…kissing the girl I up and left almost a year ago, while she was unconscious, without her permission. I didn't want to believe that her feelings for me had changed. Mine hadn't changed at all. I still loved her as much now, as I had when I first met her. That was a lie, actually. Time and distance really had made my love for her stronger. I sighed softly, taking in her scent briefly, letting it burn my throat, before heading back through the forest. I traveled at almost my normal speed, not wanting to go too fast, just in case she woke up. I didn't want to frighten her, or worse, make her pass out again.

I thought back to this morning. I had arrived in Forks only hours earlier. Alice had called me the day before and demanded that I listen to her. I had been angry with her at first, for looking into Bella's future. But she told me that she hadn't been looking for it on purpose, it had just popped into her head. She said that the vision was strange, incomplete. All she knew for sure was that Bella would be in some sort of danger very soon, and it was my responsibility to go back and help her. I had tried to argue my point, that I had no right to meddle in Bella's future, but Alice had screamed at me that if she died, I would never forgive myself, she would never forgive herself either. That had me. I couldn't imagine Bella dying. It was unacceptable. I told myself I would go back, just to check up on her, to make sure she was okay. Wait for the danger to pass and then leave, without her ever having to know I'd returned.

So, now…here I found myself back in Forks, Washington. I stopped briefly at our old house, still vacant, but I knew the others would surely be there by now, waiting for news from me. They were as eager to know about Bella as I was. Not long after that, I had found myself perched in a tree facing Bella's bedroom window. I was hoping to catch her as she left the house. I thought showing up at her window, like nothing had ever happened….Like no time had passed, would be insensitive. Not to mention it would probably have shocked her into unconsciousness…though I seemed to have managed to do that to her anyway.

I had watched her as she slept. I heard her sleep talk. She mumbled my name, I was a bit surprised by that. I had hoped that after our months of separation, I would had stopped invading her dreams. Then she surprised me again.

"Edward…you're back…please, don't leave…don't leave me again, Edward…I love you…." She still loved me? It had to be true, her subconscious couldn't lie. It made my dead heart wretch.

And then she woke up, suddenly, violently. Was that sweat I noticed in a soft sheen on her face? How odd. Had she had a nightmare? I wanted so badly to comfort her. It pained me considerably to have to sit by and let her suffer alone. For the millionth time, I wished I could read her mind. I felt worse when I noticed the look of distress on her face shortly after. Was she holding her sides? Why? I heard her heartbeat quicken and her breathe turn to gasps. My poor Bella. Had I done this to her?

I decided then that I had to speak to her. And what I was most afraid of happening, happened. I had seen her, and now, I was unable to leave her again. Then I racked my brain for a way to reveal myself to her. Not long after, she had risen, leaving her room, for the bathroom I assumed, based on her morning habits that I had become familiar with in the months before my departure. I left the tree next to her room in favor of one closer to the kitchen. But she never entered. It was then I heard the front door open.

But she hadn't eaten? Apparently, my absence had not improved her eating habits. Then I noticed as she took off across the street. Into the forest. This was uncharacteristic for her. I vaguely remembered asking her to never venture into the woods by herself. But that was a long time ago. How could I expect her to pay any attention to my wants? So, I followed behind her, curious to see where she was headed. Maybe this would be a good place to show myself. I couldn't hold out for much longer. I had to speak to her.

But, here I found myself, not even an hour later, holding her in my arms. I allowed myself to look quickly down at her. Still out cold. She was beautiful…even in this state, I couldn't help but notice. I slowed down considerably when I neared her house, walking right up to the front door and opening it. I was thankful that Charlie had left early this morning, before the sun had even risen. He must have been out fishing. Again. I carried her swiftly up the stairs, through to her room, and gently laid her still form on the bed. I pulled back the covers and placed them over her. Now I just had to wait. Think. Hope. This was torturous, but I would endure it.

It seemed like hours until she awoke, but I checked the clock…ten-thirty. She had only been out a little less than half an hour. I breathed out, relieved. Then I tensed again. How would she react to my presence? Would she hug me again? Now that she would be sure I wasn't a delusion. Or would she run from me. Scream at me to leave her house. I was truly afraid of her rejection. She lifted her lids slowly, painstakingly slow.

She looked around the room tentatively for a moment. Trying to figure out how she had gotten back into her room, I could only imagine. Then, as if something had snapped back into place, she sat upright in an instance. Her eyes flew to the corner of the room. To me. Seated in the old rocking chair. Just like old times. Then they widened. I couldn't decipher the emotion in them. Fear? Longing? Disbelief? I would have believed any of them. She quickly settled again. Opening her mouth to speak, but I beat her to it.

"Bella…you passed out, back there in the forest. I, uh…I thought I should bring you back home." I tried to smile. Tired to reassure her that I meant her no harm. But I felt so awful, it would have been an empty gesture. Not that I didn't honestly feel regret in every inch of my being. But I didn't think that I would be able to prove that to her so soon. Then she spoke. Again, I got to hear her sweet voice.

"I-I don't know what to say…." She stammered, unsure of herself. Her eyes met mine briefly, and then fell back down to her quilt. I sighed and rose from the chair. I crossed the room slowly, deliberately, so she could protest if she had wanted to. I wished silently that she wouldn't. I seated myself again at the edge of her bed, facing her.

"Why are you here? Why did you come back…I don't understand." I thought for a moment that she would burst into tears again, and I felt a wrenching pain in my abdomen, but she didn't. I had to explain myself.

"Bella…" God, it felt so good to say her name out loud. "I tried to tell you earlier…I can't be apart from you anymore. I had to come back. I don't know if you can forgive me. I would understand if you can't. But I had to come back. I have to know…." I reached out for her hand with mine, and she took it. I smiled to myself and continued. " I have to know, if you can still possibly love me, after all I've put you through." I looked at her sitting silently in her bed, still half covered in her quilt, and hoped. I knew I couldn't tell her the real reason I was back. That Alice had seen danger in her future. I didn't want to frighten her. I didn't want her to think that my only reason for returning was Alice's vision. Then she would be afraid of me leaving again. Of course, she would fear that anyway, how could she not? I did not deserve her trust.

"I…Edward…" She paused after my name. It sounded forced, like she hadn't spoken my it in years…or months rather. That hurt me just a tiny bit, but I forced it back and she continued. "I thought you didn't want me anymore…that you didn't love me…" I leaned towards her.

"Lies Bella…all lies. I thought you would let me go more willingly if you had thought I didn't care for you. Apparently, I am a better actor than Alice gives me credit for. I never in my wildest dreams thought that you would actually believe me. Believe that I could ever stop loving you in this, or any other lifetime. I'm so sorry Bella. I'm sorry that I was able to convince you so well…a part of me wished that you wouldn't believe my lie for a second. That you would call me out on it…give me a reason to stay…_make _me stay…but you just gave up…" The last of my words sounded strangled. It was hard for me to say them. The truth. What I had been denying to myself for months. She couldn't possibly love me after all of this.

"I wish that I had tried to stop you too, Edward. But…I was just so shocked…I probably would have believed anything you told me at that moment. And after you left. I couldn't bear to think about you or what you had said…so I just pushed it aside and accepted it as the truth. But, you have to trust me now, Edward…I do, I do still love you, nothing will change that….but I…it's too late." The words were so rushed, I wasn't sure I had heard them correctly. Too late? What did that mean? Had she actually moved on like I had urged her to do before I left? It would serve me right I supposed.

"I'm dating….um, Jacob…Jacob Black…From the Quileute Reservation…" She stopped herself abruptly, looking me straight in the eye. Piercing me with those big, chocolate brown eyes. I couldn't look away, even though I wanted to. I felt myself fall apart. If I had had a working heart to break, it would have split in two at that moment.

"I'm sorry Edward…so sorry…but you told me to move on, and I'll be honest, at first I didn't want to, I'm still not sure if I want to …."

Dim words of hope. Maybe I wasn't too late after all. "But I can't do that to Jacob. I can't hurt him. I do love him…maybe not as much as I love you, but I care about his feelings….….I don't know if I can leave him now….what that would do to him…" She sighed heavily and looked away from me, releasing my ice-cold hand. She was so selfless it astounded me. But she had said it. She loved me. She loved me more than this Jacob Black. There was still a chance for me to win her back, and I wouldn't give up on her. I couldn't. She was my life. I reclaimed her hand, trying to reassure her that I wasn't angry with her and she let me. Another silent victory.

"Don't be sorry, Bella….It's not your fault. You did exactly what I told you to do…and I can't blame you for that. I should never have left you alone. But I want you to know…I'll still be here for you. For whatever you need. My family and I are moving back into our old house. They couldn't stand to be away from Forks anymore either. We won't bother you if you don't want us to. I'll stay out of your life it that's what you wish….But I'll be here. If for nothing else, I'll be your friend, if you'll allow me."

She smiled warmly and made a motion to say something, but at that moment, I heard another car engine cut off in front of the house. It couldn't be Charlie. Then who…? I thought only for a fraction of a second, before my mind settled on one name. Jacob Black. "He's here, isn't he?" I asked her quietly. She nodded wordlessly. I lifted up her hand and brushed my lips against it. An innocent kiss. Friends were allowed to do that right? She hadn't objected. My insides fluttered.

"I should probably go then…" She sighed and got up from the bed, heading over to the window, opening it for me. I hadn't wanted to leave her so soon. The pain in my gut strengthened just a tiny bit. I looked at her again before I climbed out the window. "I'll be close by, Bella, I haven't finished saying what I need to say…"

"Alright…I'll be waiting, Edward." Her voice, saying my name, one more time, I reveled in it. Then I leapt to the nearest tree and waited there. I watched as Jacob Black left his car, he hadn't noticed me of course, and walked up to the door, to be greeted by Bella. By My Bella. I sighed. Regret washing through me. How could I have ever left her?


	3. Damages

(Bella's POV)

My mind was instantly racing. My heart was pounding in my chest, threatening to break through. Had that all really just happened? Edward was back. He loved me. He wanted _me _back. But Jacob. How would I even begin to explain this to him? I had no idea where to start. I did love Jacob, of that I was sure. But I also knew that I didn't love him more than Edward, not even close. It was one of the reasons I had be so reluctant to agree to date him. I was damaged. I could never give him my whole heart, because I did not have a whole heart to give. I had tried to explain this to him before we even decided to date, but he didn't seem to truly understand that I could never be his.

I knew I would never forget Edward, but I thought I could move on if he was really gone. I had never expected him to come waltzing back into my life. Now, here he was, and I had no idea how to appease both of them. Someone would end up hurt. I refused to admit it to myself, but deep down…I knew it would be Jacob. It might take time. Time for me to gather enough courage to break his heart. But I already knew I would end up back in Edward's arms. Now that I had been told the truth, he had never stopped loving me, that he still wanted me. How could I not go back? He owned my heart, my soul. He was my life. Which is why that life had come to a screeching halt when he had made the decision to leave.

Jacob would not see it this way at all, though. He was my friend, my sun, he kept me whole these last few months, but I had never fallen _in_ love with him. I didn't think I was capable of that anymore. Apparently I was wrong. I had fallen in love with Edward all over again the instant my name fell from his lips in the forest. When his icy hand held mine. When he kissed that same hand goodbye. I loved him.

Now I just had to explain to my werewolf boyfriend that I had just had an unexpected visit from my vampire ex-boyfriend. Simple. After Edward had left, I walked out of my room, pausing at the top of the stairs to collect myself, before I hurried down them. Just in time to hear the thunderous knock on my front door. I opened it.

"Jeeze, Jacob…knock the door down…" I started to laugh, but his face was deadly serious. I frown at him. "What's wrong…?" I asked tentatively. He grimaced, his nose scrunching up.

"Bella…you never called me, so I thought I would just stop-….you smell…you smell like…" His voice cut off abruptly. A pained expression crossed his face, only for a second before it was washed away with one of anger. It was then I heard a low growl rumble in his throat. He left the entrance of the house, bounding off the front steps onto the ground. He lifted his head slightly. Looking around feverishly. Then he turned to face me again. I followed him, a bit apprehensive.

"Why do you smell like that _bloodsucker_, Bella!? His scent is all over you! He touched you....He was here, I can smell him!" His anger frightened me, but I walked towards him, still…slowly.

"I…Edward…he came back to Forks. He visited me earlier…to-" I was cut off by his shouting.

"He what?! You let him come back here! Let him touch you, that filthy leech, after everything he's done to you!" I saw him ripple, tremble with effort. He was trying not to change, but was losing the battle. Had I really made him so angry? I stepped closer to him, hugging him tightly.

"Jacob, calm down, everything is fine. We just talked…all he wanted to do was apologize…" I felt the trembling slow, but not cease, he was still angry.

"What's wrong with you, Bella? Are you crazy?! He could have killed you! You're mine Bella! I won't lose you. I won't let you go back to that monster!" I cringed at his assumptions. Did he know? How could he? Suddenly I realized this task might be harder than I thought before. Right now though, I had to calm him down. He was far too worked up. He inhaled the air again, his expression contorted with rage.

"He's still _here_! Where is he Bella!? I'm going to rip off his head for touching you!"

Jacob's body trembled again, more violently this time, he made audible noises, but I couldn't describe them. He pushed me away from him, but not fast enough.

I heard him growl. "Run Bella…get out of here!" But I was rooted to the ground.

Time seemed to slow as my mid tried to wrap around what was happening. Then he was gone. My Jacob had melted into the giant wolf form, all that remained were shredded bits of his clothing, that floated around me like confetti. He snarled viciously.

I took a step back. It all happened so fast. I couldn't think. Couldn't react. I was frozen. A vision of Emily flashed before my eyes briefly. Her sad, disfigured face looking back at me. I lifted my arms up feebly to protect my head. I forced my eyes shut. I vaguely remember the sharp pain, as his huge paw connected with my abdomen, forcing me to fly backwards. Something stopped me, was it a tree? I couldn't be sure. It didn't matter now anyway. I was winded. I couldn't breathe or make a noise. I remembered hearing a bone-chilling roar, seeing a figure pass over me in a blur. Edward. Oh God…would they fight? I wanted to get up, to stop them, but then, for a second time that day, unconsciousness overtook me.

(Edward's POV)

I had promised Bella that I wouldn't meddle in her life anymore, but this was unacceptable. That Jacob Black was yelling at her. No decent man would ever raise his voice to a lady, especially one he claimed to love. I was appalled. I saw her approach him and hug him. I grimaced. I was about to descend from the tree when I saw something unnerving. Jacobs massive body was trembling, rippling, in an inhuman way. Inhuman. Bella was urging him to calm down. Then all the pieces fell into place at once. The Quileute's. Black. Alice's blurred visions. That rancid smell that I had noticed once he had left his car. Horror swept over me in an instant when I realized….Werewolf. Jacob Black was a werewolf.

God, could Bella not find a nice, normal, _human _love interest? Did she have to put herself in constant danger? The next instant, Jacob was no longer there. In his place stood a monstrous russet colored wolf. It snarled. I was frozen. How did she possibly…? I tried to assess what was taking place, but not fast enough. The beast lunged at her. _Oh, no…Bella!_ I forced myself to react, falling into a hunting crouch. As I was leaping out of the tree, about to take out that mongrel, it's enormous paw smacked into her fragile body, sending her flying at least ten feet back. She was knocked out cold, slumped down at the roots of the huge pine I had been watching from only moments before. I let out a wild roar as I rocketed over her and hit the wolf squarely in the chest. It let out another snarl. I steadied myself and shoved him up against another tree, hard. Knocking out his breathe. I waited for a fraction of a second before I flew from the wolf back to Bella. She was indeed, unconscious.

"Bella! Bella, oh God, what has that monster done to you?" I wanted to exact my revenge on that dog. To leave her, only for a moment, and make sure that he would never hurt her again, but I knew better. Bella was in bad shape. I lifted her up as gently as I could, not knowing the extent of the damage. When I tilted her head forward, a thin line of blood issued from the corner of her mouth. I gasped. Not out of desire for her blood, but concern for her health. This was not a good sign. I shot one more look at the wolf. He was whining now, trying to stand, but unable.

I was thankful that no neighbors had been present to witness the scene that had just taken place in Bella's front yard. I stood, and quickly began to run with her, back to my house. I prayed that Carlisle would be there, but I couldn't count on it. Instead I focused on running, as fast as I could, safely. I made it to the house within five minutes, bursting open the front door. The house was empty, to my surprise, but I didn't stop. I took her up to my room, laying her body down flat on my floor. I groped for my cell phone, finding it quickly and punching in the numbers for Carlisle. He answered on the first ring, his voice was anxious.

"Yes, Edward…what has happened?"

"Something went wrong at Bella's….She's made friends with a werewolf…and he's hurt her. Hit her directly in the abdomen. It's bad Carlisle…She's bleeding out the mouth…I think there might be severe internal damage…Is there anything I can do?" There was a brief pause on the other end. He sighed softly before answering.

"I think she might be bleeding out internally. If that's the case, she doesn't have much time left. Even at a hospital, there's not much they would be able to do for her….there's only one option, son….you know what that is…" His voice trailed off.

"Is there nothing else I can do?" I was in agony, and it showed in my voice. I trembled. I couldn't make this decision for her, but time was not her friend now.

"No, I'm afraid not…there's nothing that can be done to save her…mortality." He hesitated on the last word and I cringed.

"Okay, okay…alright…how much time do I have?" I had to be able to prepare myself. I couldn't make a mistake. If I killed her, even on accident. I couldn't…I wouldn't live with myself if I was the cause of her death.

"I can't be sure….not very long. Ten minutes at most, maybe….but don't waste any time…her heart has to keep beating."

"I know…I can do this…for her. I can not lose her again, I won't…." I trailed off, he seemed to understand.

"I have faith that you will do the right thing, Edward. We will be home in the morning." With that, he hung up the phone. And I let out a soft sigh.

I picked Bella up off my floor and laid her on my couch. I panicked. I wasn't positive that I actually could do this. But I had to. There were no other options now, except her death, and I wouldn't let that happen. I inhaled deeply, taking in her warm scent. Letting it burn for the final time, letting the venom collect. I leaned over her perfect form, listening to her heartbeat, thank God, it was still there. I was lamenting the fact that I would have to cause her so much pain to save her.

I wouldn't leave her side. While her body died, and changed, and reanimated itself, I would stay with her. I told myself over and over, there were no other choices. Maybe this wasn't what she wanted anymore. Maybe she had decided she wanted to stay human. If that was the case, then I was damning her, against her will. Would she hate me when she woke? Maybe. I would understand if she did. But I would have an eternity to make up for it.

If she would give me that chance. Seconds ticked by. Time was wasting. I couldn't hesitate anymore. If I could have cried, surely, now I would have. I tucked her beautiful mahogany hair behind her ear, clearing the way for my mouth.

"I'm so sorry, Bella…I love you so much, I can't bare to let you go…"I kissed her lips softly, feeling their warmth on mine one more time. Then I leaned down, into her neck. Her skin was silk. Smooth, pale, perfect…I didn't want to ruin it. Without another thought, I opened my mouth, ever so slightly, letting my teeth make contact with skin for the first time ever. I pressed down, soft at first, but then harder. I broke the skin. The venom flowed. Out of my mouth, through her wound, into her body. I wouldn't allow myself to taste her, that would be to much. I slid my tongue over the break, sealing in the venom. Letting it take it's course. Now I waited.


	4. Pain

**Author's Note. ** _Excuse the short chapter. I'm sorry. I tried to flesh it out as much as I could, but I promise, the next one will be longer, from Edward's POV. Until then, enjoy!_

_Reviews will be much appreciated. _

(Bella's POV)

I had fallen into complete darkness now. I was scared. Where was Edward now? Why hadn't he saved me? How could Jacob possibly hurt me? Did this mean I was dead? What was this then? Hell?

Then, all of a sudden, the pain hit me like a wave. The burning sensation that was all too familiar to me. I couldn't focus on anything but the searing pain. Everything was still dark, but the pain was there, coursing through every inch of me. Pulsing through my veins, burning them. It felt like my whole body was encased in flames. I was being burned alive. My skin sizzled as my muscles tensed. I couldn't control my movements. I wanted to speak, but my lips were smoldering. My saliva was like liquid fire, coating my mouth, making it impossible to get a sound out besides screams and moans. I don't know how long it lasted before I became aware of my body again, I knew I was writhing.

I could think now, just barely, let my mind wander over the possibilities. Edward must have saved me…the only way he could. He had bitten me. Turned me. God, had Jake done that much damage? He must have…I must have been dying. I knew Edward would never do this to me, if I wasn't seconds from death. I felt another, more intense wave of burning pain course through me. I writhed around again, screaming in agony. This must be torture for Edward. I knew he was with me. Even if I couldn't see him, or sense him. He was with me. Time was passing, endless seconds, minutes, hours….I had no way of knowing how much of the pain I had already endured, and how much more was to come.

I slipped in and out of awareness. After what seemed like an eternity, the veil of my pain lifted just barely so that I could hear his voice. I still couldn't speak, I was in too much pain to be able to form coherent sentences, but I could hear him speaking to me. Soothing me. Telling me I would be alright. I tried to believe him. I wanted to, desperately. I cried out again, the pain taking on a new sensation…unbelievable pressure, crushing my body. I felt like I was a piece of coal being pressed into a diamond. A fitting analogy I thought. It was getting harder to breath. Like an enormous bolder had been placed on my chest.

"shhh….Bella, love…you'll be okay. There's not much left now…The pain will be over soon. I'm here. I'm with you, Bella." His voice would drift in and out. Sometimes I could hear him clearly, sometimes, it was a muffled echo. More time passed. With it, the pain ebbed, slowly, but surely. I began to feel hope. Like I would make it through this. It felt like my body was trying to force out the burning. It would subside for a moment, then come rushing back through me, but every time it returned less intense.

I began to hear other voices. A male voice…..Carlisle? A woman's….Esme, or Alice maybe? I couldn't be sure. All that I knew for sure was that I had Edward with me. He never left me. The burning was starting to subside, into a dull heat that coursed through my whole body, but the pressure remained, squeezing my body into an unfamiliar shape. I tried to consciously move some part of myself. To lift a finger, or wiggle a toe. I willed myself to do it, but I wasn't even sure if I had been able to. Then I heard his voice, clearly this time. It sounded like music, beautiful….like I'd never heard it before.

"Carlisle…she should be close now, shouldn't she?" Worry filled his voice and it made me ache. I wanted to say something to make him feel better. Tell him I would be alright. But the words eluded me. I could feel his fingers wrapped around mine. They didn't feel quite as cold now. How could that be? But I pushed my thoughts aside, and listened.

"Yes…she's calmed down quite a bit, and her heart is slowing…it will stop soon…." His words became mumbles.

My heart would stop? Was I dying? Had Edward not gotten to me in time? No, that couldn't be it. He wouldn't have sounded so comforting before if I was dying. Then I remembered. Vampire hearts didn't beat. They lay dormant in their chests. So I wasn't dying. Quite the opposite, I thought to myself. Had it been three days already? I had no sense of time anymore. For all I knew, It could have been seconds since the burning began. It could have been months. I was having a hard time remembering what had happened previously to the burning. I could only remember bits and pieces. Jacob. Edward. Pain. No coherent memories. I don't know why, but this bothered me. I wished I could remember.

I could feel them touching me lightly. Checking my pulse. I wanted to speak. To say that I was okay, but still no words came out. Then I felt him kiss me. My cheek, my forehead, my lips. My body couldn't stop it self from reacting. But instead of speeding up, pounding out of my chest…my heart jumped slightly and then stopped completely. Dead.

The burning was gone. So was the pain, the pressure. I lifted my eyelid slowly. His beautiful face was hovering above mine. Watching me intently. His sweet smell flooded my nose, tortured my senses. I could pick out each individual scent. His face was so clear. I felt as though I had never actually seen him before. Was this what I had been missing as a human? I felt cheated. Without thinking I sat up, looking around the room. I was in his room. On his couch. I had no time to wonder how I had gotten here. I turned my attention to Edward. He flashed a smile at me, but his face had a strange look on it.

It made me sad. He was sick with worry, that much was obvious. He hadn't been hunting. Deep, purple circles under his eyes marred the beauty of his face. I lifted a hand slowly up to his cheek and rested it there.

"Bella? Are you alright? Please say something, love…do you know who I am?" His voice…would I ever tire of hearing it?

No.

"Edward…yes…of course I know who you are! I love you!" I stopped myself and clutched my throat. What had happened to my voice? It was soft, like his. But it rang like a bell, like Alice's. I guess I'd have to get used to it. It wouldn't take me long.

"Edward…you look awful…." He smiled at that, chuckling softly.


	5. Observations

(Edward's POV)

I pulled back from her soft form immediately. I couldn't risk tempting myself anymore, one bite would have to do. I pressed my hand into her hair for a moment, watching her face, waiting for the pain to show itself in her features. It wasn't long before her breathing quickened. I grasped her hand gently, preparing myself for her suffering. There was nothing I could do for her now, and that made me feel worse than helpless. Her eye began to move under their lids. Quick, unsettling movements. Her lips parted slightly, and her breathe came and went rapidly, almost in gasps.

Then it started. The screams, the crying, the suffering. She was writhing in pain, her body contorting into unnatural, unfamiliar poses. God, how could I have done this to her? Could she forgive me for this? I lifted her frail body into arms and settled back onto the couch. She cringed at my touch, crying out again. I hugged her tightly to my body, hoping that for once, my cool temperature would help her. And this was only the beginning. I could have cried. I rocked her shaking body lightly back and forth, whispering in her ear, trying to reassure her. She mumbled incoherently back at me, in between moans and cries of pain. I shuddered, pressing her closer.

As I attempted to soothe her, questions began to fill the void in my mind. What would happen to Charlie? What could we tell him? Bella would never settle to just up and disappearing on him. She would want to give him an explanation. And Jacob. His name sent my mind into a frenzy of anger. This was all his fault. She would never have been hurt if it wasn't for that mongrel. I would gladly rip his throat from him even without a reason. But would I need a reason? Bella's change would surely provoke him. And if he attacked first…it would be self-defense. And what about Bella? Would she hate me for changing her? For taking her from Jacob? For killing him? But she had told me before the incident that she still loved me. More than that dog. All of this pretense to save his feelings.

The rest of the day, and following night passed without complication. Her body continued to quake in my arms. Why was she so calm? She should have been thrashing about, screaming relentlessly, begging me for death. She was moving with pain, that much was obvious. But they were restrained movements, almost controlled. Her cries were soft, she didn't speak at all. She didn't beg me to end her suffering. Was she hiding her true pain from me? Was that even possible? I wondered. Carlisle had said that most transformations were the same. Had I done something wrong? Panic flooded through me as I looked over her frail form. Surely, the damage wasn't so bad that the venom wouldn't be able to heal her. I had delivered the venom straight to a major artery, and her heartbeat had been strong when I had bitten her, despite the extensive internal damage. No, I couldn't let myself think like this. She would be fine. She had to be.

I watched her chest rise and fall evenly, her heart was indeed still pumping blood…and venom, through her veins. I sighed in relief. Worrying would do neither of us any good right now. My Bella needed me. I was subjecting her to the most excruciating pain she would ever experience, the very least I could do was be confident for her. Be strong for her. I stroked her face softly with my thumb. She had broken out in a sweat. Physical manifestation of the mental torture her body was suffering. I cradled her closer to me, laying a hand over her forehead. I was relieved when the sun finally broke on the horizon, announcing the arrival of dawn. One day down…only two left.

I heard the slam of car doors at the front of the house, and sighed in relief. They were finally home. Carlisle's voice caught my attention first. _How is she, Edward? I'll be up in a moment._ Then Alice. _She's going to be fine now, Edward, I've seen it….don't worry so much._ I scowled. I knew she would be okay, but right now she was in unbelievable pain, and I couldn't bear to watch it. Couldn't bear to leave her. Esme piped up. _You did the right thing, dear. Don't beat yourself up over this. She won't be angry with you . _Ever the caring mother…I loved Esme, her support was what I needed most now. Carlisle knocked lightly on my door, not waiting for an answer to enter. As he did, I lifted Bella up and laid her back down on the couch, so he could examine her. He bent over her trembling body, taking up her wrist between two fingers, checking her pulse.

"Her heart is steady now. I think you did everything just right, Edward. Her body is almost done repairing itself. The worst of the pain should be over soon." He checked his watch then his eyes met mine. He smiled softly. "I know that this must be hard for you. But you couldn't have done it any better, the pain will be over for her soon. Just be strong….for Bella. I'll be back to check on her tomorrow morning…call me if you need me." I nodded looking up at him for a moment, then my eyes fell back down to my beautiful Bella. In all of her agony, she was still gorgeous. Carlisle left soundlessly. I lifted her back up to cradle her in my arms again. She no longer cringed when I touched her. She still cried out, but it was less often now, and quieter. I kissed her cheek softly. Regret swept through me…her cheek was noticeably cooler now.

Moments passed. Another knock. Alice. She came in quietly, stopping just short of the couch.

_She'll be okay Edward…" _

"I know, Alice…it's just…hard to watch this…knowing I did this to her." She set her hand on my shoulder. _She won't be mad at you for this. I see you two hunting together, not too long from now. She'll understand why you had to do it._

"That mongrel…" I mumbled to myself, but Alice picked up on it.

"What do you mean?" She had taken a seat at the far end of the couch now.

"I know why you couldn't see my conversation with Bella very well." She leaned forward now, interested. "Our little Bella here, got herself in with a pack of werewolves…." I scowled a bit. Alice sat back up, shock colored her expression. _Oh! Well that would certainly explain some things…._

"Yes. She was dating one, a Jacob Black…" I cringed, the painful memory of her rejection flooding back into my mind. Then my face went blank again. "He was the one that did this to her…hurt her, I mean, enough to where I had to change her to save her life…" I felt her stir the tiniest bit in my arms.

_No…He attacked her? Poor Bella…It's a good thing you were there Edward…she would have been killed. _I gulped at the thought.

"I know…I only wish there had been something else I could have done. This is so unfair to her. She didn't get to make the choice herself. What if she didn't want this anymore, Alice? What if she hates me for doing this to her?" Again, I felt the burn of tears I could not shed cloud my vision.

"God, Edward…stop beating yourself up! She will not hate you…she loves you." She walked over to me and Bella, placing her hand on my shoulder again. _I promise you. She loves you. She will not hold your decision against you._

"I'll leave you two alone now…it won't be long Edward…she'll be awake tomorrow morning." With that, she turned and left, again, without a sound.

With the rest of the day to think, I started to think up some plans. Surely after her change, we could not stay in Forks. Her newborn bloodlust would be unmanageable in such close proximity to a human population. Where would we go? No one even knew we were back yet, besides that dog. We could be gone in another few days without ever being noticed. We could take Bella somewhere remote. Alaska perhaps. That place had always been haven for me when my desire for blood became too overwhelming. Maybe it could be for a sanctuary for her too. We could stay with Tanya's family until our old cabin could be restored. Surely that would work.

With that, my thoughts turned reluctantly back to Charlie. He would be arriving home tomorrow to an empty house. No calls, no notes, nothing. He would panic. And he was chief of police. He would have every cop in the country on the lookout for Bella. My family wouldn't be safe from accusation within a thousand miles of forks. If he found out we had returned, surely he would suspect us of something. Of what I wasn't sure. Would he think me capable of kidnapping? Or worse, murder? Of course, I was capable of much worse than murder, but he didn't have any knowledge of that. I was sure Carlisle would think of something. He would have a plan for us.

Another wave of guilt washed over me when I realized the suffering and agony that Charlie and Renee would have to endure when they found out she was missing. She was their only child and I had stolen her from them. Would they automatically assume her to be dead? Would they think she had just run away? Or was kidnapped? Would they have a funeral? I shuddered at the thought. Surely, her absence would be noticed immediately in a town as small as this.

I was drawn from my contemplations by her soft whimpering. More tears rolled down from her eyes, over the apples of her cheeks. I wiped them away. An angel should never cry. Bella was my angel in my own personal hell. A beacon of light amid a sea of darkness. My savior. And when she awoke, I would worship her with all the devotion due to a goddess such as herself. She would hate it. That thought made me smile. She was the one who always thought me to be a God. She felt undeserving of my affections. I would prove to her that I was the unworthy one. I was most definitely, what did Emmett call it….? Oh, right…whipped. Bella would just have to get used to being waited on.

The night passed with surprising speed once again. Bella's condition continued to improve. Her breathing steadied, her heart began to slow, the soft color began to leave her face. How I would miss that visible sign of her feelings for me. I pressed my cheek to hers. They were beginning to feel more alike now. I didn't know if that should make me feel better or worse. She shifted again in my arms, wincing just a bit, more tears falling from her closed eyes. A soft cry. I tucked her hair behind her ear, whispering to her again…

"shhh….Bella, love…you'll be okay. There's not much left now…The pain will be over soon. I'm here. I'm with you, Bella." I started to rock her gently in my arms. She mumbled again…what did she say? My name maybe? I couldn't be sure.

Nothing more transpired between us the rest of the night. I was thankful as the sun began to rise. It's soft warmth and light flooded into my bedroom, bathing Bella in a light, that if possible, made her even more irresistible. Another knock came on my door and Carlisle entered.

"Carlisle…she should be close now, shouldn't she? Alice had said…" I was anxious. This torture had been going on for two days now. He came to her side again and looked back at me in surprise.

"Yes, she's calmed down quite a bit, and her heart is slowing…it will stop soon…she almost seems to be rushing through the process…she's a whole day ahead. What a miraculous girl…I'm astounded." He moved around to her other side. He lifted up her eyelid for a moment, the irises were still rolled back, leaving only white visible. He checked her pulse again. I didn't need to use those methods, to be able to tell that her heart had slowed even more. Carlisle nodded approvingly, placing her hand back down at her side.

"It will be any time now….would you like to be alone with her when she wakes up? Surely, she'll need some explanations. I can keep the rest of the family away until she's ready." I smiled up at him.

"Yes, thank you, Carlisle…I think that would be best. Alice won't like it, but she'll understand." He nodded once and was gone again.

I lifted her up with me, and laid her back down, kneeling next to the couch, still clutching her hand. I kissed her softly. Her cheek, her forehead, and finally, her lips. Those irresistibly full lips. Then she gasped. Her heart made a final thud, it's last protest for life, then it was silent. Was this it? Would she awaken now? Was I ready? I had to be. Her eyes fluttered open. I was shocked by the crimson color of her irises. It was a blaring contrast to the soft, chocolate brown they had been before. I smiled at her tentatively.

She looked at me for a moment, not quite out of her daze. She sat upright, faster than I was used to. Of course, she had my reflexes now. Another thing to get used to. I watched as she scanned the room. Her eyes fell back on mine and she lifted her hand, now even paler than before up to my face. God, I didn't think it was possible, but she was somehow even more beautiful than she had been before. How could I deserve this angel…in any lifetime?

"Bella? Are you alright? Please say something, love…do you know who I am?" I held my breath, waiting.

"Edward…yes…of course I know who you are! I love you!" She sounded breathless. I was ecstatic. She knew me. I had been so afraid that her memories of me would fade along with her other human memories. But apparently what we had was indeed special. It had followed her into eternity. And my name…it sounded so beautiful on her lips. I wanted to hear it again, and my wish was granted.

Edward…you look awful…." I smiled brightly at her and laughed. Oh, my Bella…how I had missed her. I pulled her into my arms without a second thought. This was wonderful.


	6. Rebirth

(Bella's POV)

I felt like I was in a dream. The most wonderful dream. I _must _be dreaming. I couldn't remember anything before this moment. He…Edward, my Edward, was embracing me, tightly. And me? I was a vampire. I didn't need any sort of confirmation to know what I had become. It felt so right. I looked up at him. His eyes shined. It made me smile. I took my chance then. I lifted myself up and took his lips with mine. He seemed delighted. He kissed me back without restraint. Again, I couldn't help but feel cheated. The kiss lasted too briefly. He pulled away. I looked back at him, pouting. He chuckled at me, pulling a bit of my hair and wrapping it around his fingers, kissing it. 

"Edward…what happened? I can't remember anything…" He sighed and led me to sit back down with him on the couch. Sitting felt strange, uncomfortable. 

"You know, Bella…you could have told me your new boyfriend was a werewolf." I gulped. Regret washed through me.

"I'm sorry…you know…I didn't find out too long ago myself…but, what did he do to me? I can't remember what happened really. Just saying goodbye to you….answering the door…he was yelling at me." Edward took my hand in his and looked down.

"He transformed Bella. I guess my scent made him angry. But a young, angry werewolf is quite possibly even more dangerous than a hungry vampire. They'll kill their own mother, their best friend…their lovers…." He looked at me, eyes full of regret. "He knocked you out cold. Damaged your organs from what I could tell, you were bleeding internally…I called Carlisle, he said you didn't have much time left…" he paused, his expression changed, he looked like he was in physical pain. "I didn't have any other choice, Bella…I'm so sorry. I couldn't lose you again. I'll understand if you can't forgive me." I brought my hand to his chin, and lifted it up so that his eyes met mine.

"Edward. No. Don't feel bad. I know you wouldn't do this unless you didn't have any other choice. It's not your fault Jacob hurt me. And you saved me. I would be dead right now if it wasn't for you!" He cringed at the mention of my death. I took him into my arms. "I love you. Don't you believe me?" He smiled the tiniest bit back at me.

"Of course I do Bella. I love you too." I let him go gently. 

"I guess I really am yours now, though. Jacob won't want a vampire for a girlfriend." He scowled. My attempt to lighten the mood had failed.

"Bella, he almost killed you! How can you take this so lightly?" Great. He was angry with me. 

"He couldn't help it…he didn't know what he was doing…" My new voice was feeble in it's attempt to defend him. I knew Edward was right, but I couldn't bring myself to be mad at Jacob for it. I sighed. 

"I'm sorry Bella…but I didn't want to win you back this way. I've taken your mortality…taken_ you_…by force. You deserve better." 

"I didn't exactly give you any other options…" Was all I could come up with. He was not satisfied with this answer, but he did not press the subject. Instead, he looked back at me with a smirk.

"The family wants to meet their newest member. Alice is literally bouncing off the walls…Jasper thinks she's gone mad…" 

"So…you all want me to live here now?" I still couldn't help but feel like an intruder. I hadn't even spoken to any of the Cullens' besides Edward in almost two years.

"Bella…of course. You were always family. To all of us. Did you think I would put you out on the streets after confessing my undying love for you?" He smirked again and drew me closer to him. 

"No, I guess you wouldn't." At that thought, I smiled and nodded.

My new 'family' was waiting for me. Excitement overtook me and I jumped up. 

"Let's not keep them waiting then." He laughed at my enthusiasm and stood beside me, taking my hand in his. His hand wasn't cold anymore, I noticed. "What happened…your hand…your whole body…it feels warm…"

He smiled down at me before explaining.

"Of course, Bella, we're the same temperature now, love. You're not human anymore. To them, you'd feel just like how I used to feel to you." I grinned back. His touch had always felt wonderful…but now it was absolutely exquisite. 

We left his room and he pulled me along the hallway. I looked around astounded. Everything was so clear, perfect. Like a cloudy veil had been lifted from over my eyes. I took in the new smells I had never noticed before. Hints of lavender came from Alice and Jasper's room. Sandalwood wafted from Carlisle's study. Other lovely scents filled the hall, but I ignored them. I jumped suddenly at the sound of a bird landing in a tree outside. How had I heard that? Edward chuckled beside me, obviously amused. 

I could hear the others waiting for me downstairs. Their nervous, unnecessary, human movements as they prepared themselves. I looked at Edward. He smiled at me, reassuringly. I gripped his hand tighter as we descended the main stairs down to the living room below. Alice was the first to jump up, racing…no, dancing over to me with her usual grace. Even as a vampire, I didn't believe I would ever be able to achieve that kind of flawless movement. 

"Bella!" She tore me away from Edward, hugging me tight. I smiled into her neck as she embraced me for what seemed like an eternity. She pulled me back, holding me at arms length. Examining me.

"Edward…She's beautiful…" If I had been able, I would have blushed a deep crimson at that point. Edward seemed to sympathize with me. 

"Thank you, Alice…I was well aware of that…" He chuckled lightly as he reached for my hand. My new sister relinquished her hold on me. 

"But these cloths…god, it's the same thing you were wearing _days_ ago…this is unacceptable…" She trailed off, mumbling about my poor style and how she would change it. I was afraid that she would grab me, right then and there, and drag me up to her room. Treat me as her dress-up doll until she was satisfied with my appearance. 

Instead, to my great relief, Edward wrapped his arms around my waist and held me to him. I smiled up at him, and he returned a bright grin. The rest of the family approached. Jasper came up first, smiling, nodding at me, and taking his place by Alice. Carlisle and Esme came up to me next. She reached for my hands and held them for a moment, looking me up and down. She seemed to be satisfied with how I had turned out. 

"Welcome to the family, Bella, dear." She hugged me gently, releasing me to smile up at her eldest son. 

Carlisle stood behind her, his hands resting on her shoulders. He flashed his brilliantly white teeth at me.

"I'm glad you're feeling better now, Bella. We hope you like it here." Emmett came up and slapped me hard, on the shoulder, he frowned a bit when I didn't even flinch at the contact. I felt Edward tense up behind me. 

"Damn, she is strong, isn't she." He laughed to himself and Edward sneered at him. "Glad you finally came around, Edward, she makes a much better sister when she's not so breakable." He grinned, but Edward didn't find the humor. I smiled back weakly. Rosalie followed behind him. She smiled at me tentatively, not sure how to react. She nodded at me. "Bella…" Was all she could manage. I smiled back. I knew that it wasn't really anything about me that Rosalie didn't like. It was more the fact that I was…or had been, a human, and that my interference with the family posed a threat to her preferred lifestyle. I could understand her fears. Now that I was one of them, I no longer posed that threat. Perhaps, now we could become friends. I hoped so. It seemed as if, at that moment, Edward could really read my thoughts. He whispered in my ear, not even a murmur, but I heard it clearly. 

"Don't worry, She'll come around. Give her some more time." I nodded silently. 

He looked down at me briefly, before addressing his whole family. 

"I think it's time for Bella to go hunting…" He smirked at my reaction. I tensed up now, against his chest. His- no…Mine- no…Our family nodded, not quite in unison at his statement.

I became suddenly anxious. Was I ready for this? I felt the burning in my throat. It screamed at me to find the one thing that would satisfy it. Blood. Human blood. I shook my head. No. I would never let myself slip. I would stay true to the Cullen lifestyle. Feeding only on the blood of animals. I knew it would be hard to ignore the burning when I came into contact with humans. But I would find a way to manage. All the others did. 

For the first time, I could truly appreciate the absolute pain, the suffering Edward had endured every moment he spent in my presence before my change. It was torture. It only made me love him more. Either, my Edward was a masochist, or his love for me was even more powerful than his thirst. Now that I felt that thirst myself, I knew what his devotion meant. I pressed myself against him at this thought. He smiled back at me.

"Are you ready, love?" He took my hand and led me out the front door, onto the steps. 

"I guess I have to be…" He laughed lightly, and I smiled. I knew he would help me. In comparison to everything else that had happened in the last seventy-two hours….teaching me to hunt would be a cake walk.


	7. Hunting

(Edward's POV)

Despite the circumstances, I couldn't help but feel excited. I had never wanted Bella to be near me when I hunted while she had been human. That would have been far too reckless, too dangerous. She did not yet know what it felt like to have all of your civility be clouded and overtaken by instinct. I knew it would be hard for her, that she would hate to lose control, because we all felt that way. But, while I was unable to help her during her change, here, with this new task, I could. She followed me without resistance as we headed south of the house. I dropped her hand momentarily as we approached the river. Her eyes widened. I laughed.

"It's nothing, Bella…really. You can make it across." I took a few steps forward and then leapt effortlessly across the crystal clear water, landing with a light thud in the grass on the other side. She gawked.

"Edward…you did see me just trying to _walk _while I was human, right? I can't do this…" She wrung her hands together nervously.

"Bella, love…you are not a human anymore. You're capable of things you never imagined before. It's nearly impossible for you to be clumsy in this body." I reached out a hand, encouraging her.

"Oh…I think I'll find a way…" She joked before taking a few steps back. She gave herself a jogging start. One she didn't need. She overshot the bank on the other side, landing instead ten or twelve feet further into the forest. I hurried to her side.

"See…what did I tell you. It's nothing." Her eyes were wide. With what…fear? My dear Bella had a lot to learn.

"Nothing to you, maybe…" I wrapped my arms around her, again taking in the sweet scent that no longer burned me. I inhaled deeply. "You keep doing that…" She mused.

"You have no idea how lovely you smell, and how wonderful it is to be this close without causes myself any pain." I kissed the top of her head. Her hair was still mussed from the ordeal a few days earlier. I would have to make sure she got a shower when we got back. She lifted her lips to mine, and kissed me for the second time since she had woken. It was such a different feeling than kissing her as a human had been. Not a bad one, no, it was amazing to not have to restrain myself when kissing her anymore. She lifted her arms and secured them behind my head, pulling me closer, if it was possible. I slid my hands down her back, resting them on her hips, pressing our bodies together. She made a tiny whimper and I pulled away.

"Did I hurt you…?" I was confused. As a newborn, she was still much stronger than I was.

"No…no, it was wonderful. I just…" She hesitated and frown a bit. "I want more…" I laughed softly, but stopped when I saw her expression. She was serious.

"Bella…do you honestly believe that I don't want you as much as you want me?" She looked away. I lifted a hand to her chin and pulled her eyes back to mine.

"I love you, Bella. I want you in every way. But here, in a forest…well I may be a vampire, but I'm still a gentlemen. I will not make love to you in the woods…." I paused, reassessing my words.

"Well…not the first time at least." This made her smile. I tucked her hair behind her ear and kissed her forehead.

"When?" I chuckled at her again.

"God, Bella…you still have a one track mind."

"Well…no one would blame me. Not with a boyfriend who looks like, well…" She took a step away from me and waved her hand up and down in my direction.

"Boyfriend? Does this mean you've forgiven me for my earlier…indiscretion" I couldn't bring myself to say the words.

"Of course, I forgave you the minute you came back…and as for changing me. I never want you to blame yourself for that. You didn't have a choice." She smiled softly and I felt an overwhelming desire to hold her, but I rethought that action considering how she might take it at the moment. Instead, I responded to her previous statement.

"But…I don't know, Bella…I manage to think about other things…even with a _girlfriend _who looks like.." I mimicked her motions in her direction. She laughed, and pulled herself back up against me.

"Then, what are you waiting for?" She kissed me again, briefly.

"The right time, Bella. I just got you back from that…that dog, I just-" I stopped. I wanted to ask her something. But I was afraid of the answer. What if that mutt had touched her while I was away. The monster in me growled in protest. I had to know.

"Bella…did he…and you…did you ever…you know, _do_ anything? While I was gone…" I stumbled over the words. Did I want to know? No. I _had_ to know. She seemed to catch my meaning.

"Did we ever…_oh._ oh…no. No, Edward, we didn't….not that Jake didn't want to be…intimate with me. He was a bit too eager about it, actually. He said he wanted to…" She hesitated again. Maybe the memory was hard for her. But, I was still relieved, she had said no. I grasped her hand to encourage her. "to make me…forget you. Forget everything about you and what you did to me…and I told him that I never wanted to forget you. That made him angry. He tried a few more time, but he gave up eventually." She sighed. I smiled a little, and stroked her jaw line with my fingers, trying to make her feel better, but the monster inside was roaring with pleasure. She hadn't wanted to forget me. She had resisted those impulsive human urges, because she still thought of me, still loved me. She had been_ waiting_ for me.

"Well, I'm not going to lie to you, Bella, I'm glad you didn't. That must sound so awful. But the idea of anyone else ever touching you like that, it makes me sick." I shook my head, I was a little embarrassed of myself. Bella wasn't property after all. But she still smiled at me, taking both my hands in hers.

"I was always yours, Edward. Even when you were gone. Even when I thought you didn't love me anymore. Even when I had Jake. He wasn't you. I was empty without you."

"Oh, Bella…I don't know how I was ever able to leave you. I don't know how you could believe that I would ever stop loving you." She kissed me again. Hard. A wave of desire washed over me. I pulled her close. If it took the rest of our eternity together, I would prove to her that I would never stop loving her. She was my life. Suddenly, she pulled away.

"What is it…?" I looked down at her and she smiled at me, looking sheepish.

"I, um…I think I need to hunt now…" I smiled at her, and took her hand again in mine.

"Sorry, Bella…I guess we got a bit distracted…"

"Where are we going to go?" I thought for a moment. I remembered Emmett saying something about a herd of moose not too far up north. Moose. The thought of my tiny little Bella taking down a gigantic bull moose stirred some primal desire in me. Watching her hunt might be too much to handle. It might force me to go back on my promise. I laughed at myself. She turned her face up to mine.

"What? What's so funny?" I smirked.

"Nothing really…I'm just trying to imagine you taking down a moose all by yourself." She pouted a bit. It was adorable. "But, yes…I was thinking moose would be a good first kill. You'd only have to take down one or two to take the edge off your thirst." I smiled at her, watching her expression as she surely imagined herself hunting moose with her bare hands.

"Would you like to run with me, love?" I was excited to share this, one of my greatest joys, with her. She looked back up at me, her eyes alight with anticipation. I grinned at her. Still holding her hand, I took off, and she followed without hesitation. I half expected her to close her eyes, to let me lead her through the forest, but she didn't. Her eyes were wide, bright, excited.

The trees flew by in a green blur. One melding into the next. Our feet never left the ground, but it felt as though we were flying. I knew the experience would be exhilarating for her. It certainly was for me the first time. I remembered it clearly, all those years ago. We ran for a solid fifteen minutes. Never stopping, never tiring or running out of breathe. I was sure she would be doubting her new body's capacity for this activity.

At that moment, I stopped. She stopped with me, not missing a beat. It was like she was already attuned to me. I lifted my head. Inhaling the many scents that flooded the forest. I found the one I was searching for in a fraction of a second. She seemed to mimic my actions, her eyes widened as she caught the scent too. She looked at me. They were close. A few hundred yards to the west. I led her with me until we spotted them in a clearing. It was a small herd. Only five animals. Four females and one, enormous bull moose. The span of his antlers was wider than Bella was tall. I looked at her for a moment. She looked from the bull to me, and nodded. I smirked. So, she would fulfill my little fantasy.

"Do you want me to show you want to do first?" I could see that she was already losing herself a bit. Fighting back her instincts, she shook her head at me. Unable to speak.

"Okay, love…whenever you're ready." I leaned back into my crouch, waiting for her to go first. She looked at me, and mimicked me again. Then her instincts kicked in, took over. She lunged out before I could take another breathe. She was utterly silent as she flew through the air towards her prey. She was magnificent.

Leaping onto the creatures' massive back, placed her delicate hands on either side of the beast, and twisted it's neck swiftly, first to the right, then the left. The poor thing never had a chance. My Bella was a beautiful huntress. She did not waste any time, still clinging to the animal as it fell unceremoniously to the ground. She pressed her soft lips to it's neck and that was the end of it. Her eyes flickered shut and she drained it faster than I would have thought possible.

The females had long since scattered, but I didn't care. I was enthralled with Bella. She may have been a newborn, but her grace was unparalleled. I leapt out into the clearing, approaching her slowly. She stopped suddenly, dropping the bull's head to the ground. I smiled at her frazzled look. Her hair was a mess. Her crimson eyes wide, but the color was dulling, the tiniest bit. There was fur all over her cloths and her lips and cheeks were smeared red. She hissed softly at the sound of my approach, but calmed when she turned and saw me. Regaining her senses. I walked up and pulled her close, leaning my head down, I kissed her softly. She groaned at my restraint and drew me closer to her. I smirked and flicked my tongue across her lips. The blood was still fresh on them. Her smell was so intoxicating, I had to pull back. She frowned at me.

"You're a mess, Bella." She pouted again and pulled away from me. A growl escaped my chest and I grabbed her arms drawing her back into my chest. I knew she had given in, because with her newborn strength, she could have easily broken my grasp.

"Don't get me wrong, I think you're very…." I paused for emphasis. "_very_ attractive like this…but Alice won't agree with me." I chuckled and she smirked.

"Okay fine. We'll go clean up…but you didn't get to hunt…" She looked apologetic for a moment.

"Don't worry about me, I'll make up for it later…but what about you? Have you had enough…we could keep hunting if you want." She thought for a moment and then shook her head at me, a few pine needles that had been lodged in her hair broke free and fell to the ground. I smiled.

"Okay then, let's head back." We were off and running in an instant, the wind flying past us, offering no resistance. We were at the forests edge in ten minutes.

Then panic flooded through me as I caught the unmistakable scent of humans near by. I grabbed Bella just in time, stifling a growl from her. The scent flooded the area around the house. She strained against me, groaning, crying out.

"Oh, god…Edward…it burns. What's happening?" She was pulling against my hold, more forceful now. I breathed out, relieved as Jasper and Emmett hurried down from the house, using their inhuman speed to the advantage. Their expressions were tinged with worry. It was then that I saw the cause of the commotion. Parked out in front of our house. Charlie's cruiser.


	8. Complications

(Bella's POV)

The scent hit me like a wreaking ball. Overwhelming. Before I had the chance to react, I felt Edwards' arms wrap themselves tightly around me. Half of me hated him from stopping me, the other half, thankful that he was there to stop me from doing something I would regret. I felt myself beginning to slip again. Into my predatory mode. I growled, and thrashed against him. Begging him to let me go, let me have them. But he didn't let up. I was vaguely aware of Jasper and Emmett as they joined us, taking me from Edward. I growled louder in protest.

"What is he doing here?" I heard Edward ask. He? Who was _he_? I turned my head, looking for the source of their conversation, and then I found it. Oh God…Charlie's car was parked right out in front of the Cullen's house. He must be inside. Was that what I was lusting for? My own father's blood? I was disgusted with myself. But still, by body reacted. Venom pooled in my mouth, and stung my throat. I writhed and twisted, trying to escape the hold of my brothers. Thank god they were there.

"What do you think he's doing here Edward?" I heard Emmett say, exasperated. "He's looking for Bella. She's been missing for three days now, and he heard that we were back in town."

Edward had tensed up, unable to continue his façade of breathing. He shook his head slowly.

"What do we do….?" Was all he could manage. Jasper piped up.

"Carlisle is taking care of it. He assured Charlie that you didn't return home with us. That you were still over in Europe. And that none of us had seen Bella since we returned home. He seems to be believing us. But if you barge in, the whole cover will be shot to hell. You two have to leave. Now."

I screamed a bit louder now.

"Damn it, let me _go_!" I thrashed around again, unable to break their hold on me. "Edward! Make them let me go, I have to go. We have to _leave_!" They all paused, shocked at my words. I was shocked too. My desire not to harm my father was overruling my desire for human blood. I had to get away from the house. Away from this scent that clouded my thoughts, marred my judgment.

He took my hand. "Bella, you know what this means, don't you? We can't come back to Forks, not for a long, long time. Charlie and Renee…they'll think you've runaway. They might think that you died." He sounded remorseful. It made me miserable.

"I'm dead, already Edward. You're all I have left. You and this family and I'll do whatever it takes to protect you all. If I have to go live in a shack in the woods for fifty years, then I will." I could feel my senses returning to me. How? I looked back to the house. Charlie's car was gone. I sighed in relief. "We have to go."

He nodded and took me back from my brothers, holding me close, just in case I lost control again, I thought to myself.

"Okay. You and me. We'll head up to Alaska. Visit the Denali clan for awhile maybe." He turned to his brothers. "What about the rest of you? You can't just up and leave right after this."

"Yes, we know." Jasper answered. "Carlisle said we should wait. A few months at least, if not more. Let the commotion die down a bit. Then we can come up and join you. The last thing we need right now is you on a suspects list." Edward scowled. Jasper continued. "You two need to get packed. And hurry, for all we know, cops could be watching the place by now…" Edward picked me up in his arms. I began to protest but stopped myself. The three of them took off towards the house at inhuman speed, and I tucked my head into his chest. I didn't want to leave.

But I had to protect my new family, and see as how this was all my fault, I thought this was the least I could do. We were inside in a matter of seconds. Edward held me until we were with the rest of the family in the living room, he sat me on the couch in the center and took his place beside me, resting an arm around me. I leaned into him. The others all had varying expressions of concern on their faces, except Rosalie, who looked utterly contempt. Perhaps friendship would not come so easily with her after all. I felt guilty. I hadn't been a vampire three days, and I'd already managed to screw things up. I hung my head. Carlisle cleared his throat before speaking.

"So, Jasper already explained everything to you?" We nodded solemnly. "Charlie was panicked, obviously, but we had no trouble convincing him you had nothing to do with it, Edward. But I'm sure he won't remained convinced for long. He'll be back. I've already talked to Tanya. She said their extra cabin is open for you whenever you need it. I suggest you leave as soon as possible. I'm so sorry Bella. We saw this coming, but didn't really want to take the precautions for it. We were all so happy about you joining the family." He trailed off. Just then, a thought struck me, horrified me. Jacob. He knew. Would he tell Charlie? Tell him that Edward had come back? I shook my head.

"Wait…Jacob…he knows Edward came back. I told him he had, right before he…" I couldn't finish. They all seemed to understand. Edward answered me first.

"No, he won't be a problem. He ran off, right after he recovered from the fight. Headed north. Perhaps he felt remorse for practically killing you…" Edward said scowling, then continued. "He's been missing for days now, I read Charlie's mind. Actually, Jacob Black is higher on his list of suspects than I am right now."

I was a bit stunned. Charlie loved Jacob, but I guess when it came to kidnapping his daughter, the affection died. I wouldn't let myself dwell on these questions now though. There were much more important things to take care of. Edward stood and took me with him. The others began to bustle around too, spreading to different parts of the house. Alice followed us, I turned to her, question in my eyes.

"What? Like I'm really going to let you pack by yourself…Ha!" She mocked me. Edward smirked. "Besides, you don't have any cloths to pack anyway. Don't worry!" Her voice rang like a bell, as usual. "You can have some of my things. I've been looking for a reason to go shopping in Seattle anyway." She giggled.

"Right, since when do you need a reason to shop, Alice?" I laughed back at her as we continued up the stairs. Edward paused, dropping my hand.

"I'll be there in a minute, this won't take long…wish I could say the same for you…" He eyed his pixie sister anxiously. "Remember, Alice…we have to be able to carry what you pack." I could tell he wasn't joking. I frowned at the thought of trudging through snow drifts dragging along a trunk full of cloths.

"Oh, don't be so dramatic, Edward." She teased him before he headed up the next flight of stairs, leaving me and Alice alone to venture into her expansive closet.

"Here…" She handed me a rather large backpack. "Now, since you don't need to waste space with food or camping supplies…you'll have plenty of room for a wardrobe." I groaned again.

"Alice…how long with it take? To get to Alaska, I mean." She spoke from her closet, if you could call it that, it was more like a small bedroom.

"Oh, the way Edward moves…maybe a day…You'll be in Denali by nightfall." I sighed with relief. Even though the elements no longer had an effect on me, I still did not relish the idea of having to spend the night in the Alaskan wilderness.

"Ugh…Look at you. You need to shower. Now. Before you leave. What will they think if you show up looking like a wild animal…" Alice was now shoving me in the direction of her bathroom, which rivaled in size to the closet. I started to protest, but decided it wouldn't do any good.

"Don't worry about anything else. I'll pack for you, and leave some fresh cloths on the counter." She smiled and sprinted away before I could get another word in.

When I got to the bathroom, I looked in the mirror. Fully taking in my new appearance for the first time. It was true that, by vampire, or…Alice's terms, I looked horrid. My hair was a mess, and my cloths were torn in some spots, caked with blood, I couldn't tell if it was mine or the moose's. Other than that, I was stunning.

My facial structure had changed ever so slightly, but just enough to make a difference. My cheekbones were higher, skin white as snow and smooth, flawless. My hair, despite it's condition, was longer, shiny, with the same soft curl it had when I was human. I ran my fingers lightly down my jaw line. It was more ridged, strong. I looked at my eyes and almost gasped out loud. The color was vivid red, shadowed in thick lashes. I had to tear my eyes away from the mirror, the image was beginning to scare me. I knew I was essentially the same, but I looked so different. So much like him.

But I was wasting time now, there would be time later to get used to this new body. I ripped the ruined sweater from my body. Slipped my jeans and shoes off and turned on the shower. When the water was lukewarm, I stepped in and let the warmth spread over me. Alice's shower was stocked with all kinds of products. Soaps, lotions, shampoos, and conditioners. Some of the labels were in foreign languages. I grabbed one that smelled similar to my old favorite shampoo back at home quickly lathered my hair.

I scrubbed myself vigorously to clean off the thin layer of grime that had collected on my otherwise perfect skin during out short hunting trip. My new inhuman speed allowed me to finish in mire minutes. I stepped out into the bathroom, twisting the knob on the shower to turn it off. I found a towel and a pile of cloths on the counter on the opposite side of the room. I quickly dried off, tossing the towel into a hamper

I reluctantly pulled the underwear from the pile of clothing. So Alice. They were black, lacy…barely there. I sighed as I slipped them on. I was trekking through the wilderness, not trying to seduce Edward in a Parisian hotel. Not that it would take much seducing. I laughed to myself. The bra was of similar design. I also found a sweater, plain by Alice's standards. Maybe she did remember where I was going. Then another sweater to put on top of that. I wondered why the layering? It wasn't like I would get cold. I slipped on the long socks and jeans, and finished the outfit with a study pair of hiking boots. She must have bought them at the Newton's sporting goods store. I quickly pulled my damp hair into a sloppy bun and walked back out into her room to see that she had finished packing and was teetering on the edge of her bed, purely ornamental, waiting for me.

"God, you still take forever, Bella." She teased as I walked back to her.

"I'm still getting the hang of it…." I sat beside her on the bed. "So, these vampires in Denali. What are they like?" I was curious about who we would be staying with for an undetermined amount of time.

"Oh, they're great. Tanya, Kate, and Irina…they're sisters. Carlisle's known them for decades, Edward too." Alice laughed a bit as she thought to herself. "Tanya's always had a thing for Edward, but he always turns her down. It's kind of funny to see. She's not used to being rejected. Of course, most of her exploits are humans, so…" I frowned at her, sickened by the thought of any other woman ever trying to seduce Edward. Now I understood his earlier reaction to the thought of Jake touching me.

"Oh, Bella…He's never wanted Tanya. Believe me, she would have had him by now if he did." She paused, seeing no change in my expression. "He loves _you_ Bella, _you're _the one he's been waiting for. He knows that." I brightened a bit and she smiled at me.

"Besides, once she meets you, she'll lay off him. She's not that rude." Alice had risen now, lifting the backpack, no doubt, loaded with cloths I could never see myself wearing. "She'll be able to sense yours and Edward's connection. Not that he won't make it obvious who he belongs to." She laughed in a sweet, high tone, then glanced back at me.

"Well, what are you waiting for? You two have a lot of ground to cover." I sprang up from the bed, following her out the door and back downstairs to the others. Edward was waiting there too, talking to Carlisle, so low, even I couldn't hear what he was saying. I wondered briefly what they were discussing. His eyes lit up when he saw me, and he was at my side in a second.

"You look lovely, Bella…" He whispered in my ear, and I was glad I couldn't blush anymore.

Alice handed him the back pack and he frowned.

"Is all this really necessary, Alice?" He groaned at her and she sneered.

"Of _course_ it is. Bella needs variety." I held out my hand, offering to take the bag. Edward looked at me, surprised.

"I'm not going to make you carry this…here, take mine, it's considerably lighter." He handed me his pack, which was quite a bit smaller, and I slung it over my shoulder. Carlisle followed us to the back door. He spoke to me.

"Now, Bella I'm sure I don't need to tell you how dangerous this is for you. You're only a day old, and if you two happen upon some hikers or hunters…I don't know if Edward will be able to restrain you." I filched at what he was implying and nodded.

"I know. But I feel like this whole situation is all my fault. I have to go. To keep you all safe."

He smiled at me gently and placed his hand on my shoulder.

"Okay then. As long as you understand. But it's not like we're saying goodbye…" I looked around at the solemn faces. I hated to see my new family like this. "We'll all see each other again soon. The rest of us will be up in Denali before you know it." He moved to hug me, and then Edward tightly, then opened the door for us.

"We'll see you soon!" Alice chirped behind us. Then, the door was closed and we were alone. I snuck a look up at Edward. His eyes met mine.

"It'll be okay Bella, I promise. I'll keep you safe." He took my hand and we were taking off through the forest the next instant.


	9. Confrontation

_Hello everyone! Thank you for the support thus far in the story. I appreciate the adds and the reviews. This is a particularly long chapter in Edwards' POV. I considered turning it into two separate chapters, but I thought it just flowed better this way. In this chapter is my first ever attempt at a lemon! Hooray! Enjoy it, and tell me what you think._

_(Edward's POV)_

I looked over briefly to Bella, to check her face for any signs of discomfort, there were none. I smiled a her. She was focused. I don't think she'd realized yet that running for us was second nature, and she didn't have to work so hard at it. I laughed a bit at her expression, and she turned to me, pouting.

"What's so funny?" I tightened my grip on her hand and smiled again.

"Sorry to disturb your concentration." She looked at me, confused. "You know, you really don't have to pay much attention to what you're doing. Your body does all the work. Your mind is free to wander." Understanding lit her face, and I swore I could still see her blush somewhere on her pale cheeks. Confrontation

"Well…I don't think I want to let my mind wander too much right now anyway…" I frowned at her.

"Why's that? What's on your mind?" She turned away from me. Now I was curious.

"It's nothing. I'm just thinking about all the people I left behind. With no goodbyes." I knew she would regret this. I slowed our pace just a little and looked back at her.

"I'm sorry Bella…I should have taken your feelings into more consideration. I knew you wouldn't want to do this so suddenly…not be able to leave Charlie, Renee and your friends with an explanation. I looked down, not able to meet her eyes anymore.

"No. Edward, if you hadn't done this…I would be dead. At least this way…in a few more years, maybe I can go back and see Charlie, explain things to him then. I don't regret this, Edward. I'm happy. I want to be with you. Please believe me." I sighed and nodded. We had already covered a few hundred miles. It was then that I caught a scent in the air. It was human…but something else too. Something animal. Hunters, maybe? But that smell was not appetizing at all. It didn't matter, I grabbed Bella in my arms and stopped dead, trying to assess the situation. She hadn't caught the scent yet, thankfully.

What was that smell? There was only one source of the scent. Something both human and animal. But it couldn't be. Not him. Not now. It was too late though, and Bella looked up at me, fear coloring her expression.

"What is that smell?" She looked at me, then inhaled again, her nose crinkling up in response. "It's horrible…"

"It's werewolf." I corrected her. I watched her make the connection in an instant. I remembered what I had said earlier. About the dog taking off after his attack on Bella. About him heading north. Could we have really crossed paths? The wilderness was so expansive, couldn't he find some other part to sulk in. This would surely be hard on Bella. She tugged on my sweater collar.

"He's coming this way. I think he smells us too." She whispered to me, but I could already tell. I tired again in vain to see into Bella's mind. Her expression was stern, maybe even angry. Rightfully so, I thought to myself. Then I heard a rustling in bushes about a hundred yards to the east of where we stood. Bella's grip on my hand tightened as he made his way to us, arms crossed against his chest, face as stern as Bella's, clad in only a pair of cut off shorts. He stopped ten feet away from us, lifted his nose to the air, and recoiled almost as quickly. I saw his eyes sweep over Bella quickly, taking in her new appearance. He would know what it meant. The pale skin, red irises, inhuman beauty, could only mean one thing: Vampire. He glared at me menacingly, then turned back to Bella and spoke.

"God…Bella…What did he do to you!" Was he angry at her? This was unacceptable. I heard Bella hiss under her breathe and I growled a response.

"What did_I _do? You have got to be kidding, dog." He growled back at me.

"Was I talking to you, you filthy leech? At least I didn't turn her into a monster!" He shouted again. Could this mongrel not speak in a civil tone? I wondered.

"At least he didn't _kill_ me!" I heard Bella retort, just a hint above yell. She was defending me.

"You'd be better off dead!" As soon as the words left his mouth I heard his internal monologue begin. _Oh, shit! I shouldn't have said it like that…she'll take it the wrong way…If it wasn't for that bloodsucker, none of this would have ever happened. This is all his fault._ But he could not take back the words that had exited his mouth uncensored and they echoed through the trees, seeming to be amplified by them. Bella cringed. He seemed to also. I let out a low growl, stepping forward.

"I-I didn't mean it like that Bella." He took a step towards her, I pushed her slightly behind me.

"Oh, really? Well it sure as hell sounded like it. Too bad you're never going to get your wish." She spoke again and slipped one arm around my back, pulling herself closer. I smirked.

"So, this is what you want then? To be a bloodsucking monster with _him?_" His voice dripped with disgust.

"Yes. It is. It's better than being six feet under." I wondered to myself bitterly if that was the truth.

But if this was what she wanted, then how could I deny her? I was too selfish.

"I'm sorry Bella…" His face fell. "I'm sorry I lost control with you. Sorry this had to happen."

"It's too late for apologies now, Jacob. What's done is done. I'm leaving now. You should go home…" Her voice had grown softer. He tensed up again, trying to regain his defensive façade before he spoke.

"Whatever, I'll go home when I'm ready….enjoy your life with the bloodsucker." "Oh, she will." I couldn't help but answer back, smugly. I lifted her face up to mine and kissed her without restraint.

"_You don't deserve her, leech…"_ Jacobs voice rang out in my head like my own conscience. I knew I didn't deserve her, no…but she _wanted _me.

"_She was mine. I loved her…I loved her and you stole her from me. I won't forget this. You're a monster, and I'll find a way to save her. _

His mental vow worried me, but not enough to distract me from the woman I held in my arms. She smiled, unable to hear the words he had unknowingly spoken to me and turned back but Jacob was already heading into the trees, in another second, he had exploded into a mess of fur and was gone.

"That went well…" She said sarcastically. I hugged her to me, suddenly needing her to be closer.

"Don't worry about it. He had no right to speak to you that way. If he does it again, I'll rip out his vocal cords…" She slapped my arm lightly.

"Don't do that…you're better than that, Edward. Besides, I don't have any intention of ever speaking to him again." That thought calmed me and I lifted her easily into my arms before taking off through the woods again.

"We'll be in Denali in a few more hours."

"Okay…if you insist on carrying me, I guess I'll just rest." I looked down at her.

"Bella…you know you can't sleep."

"I know…that doesn't mean I can't close my eyes and pretend." I smiled at her, but it was empty. Sleep. One more thing I had stolen from her. She nestled herself into my neck and was silent.

We ran non-stop for hours. The trip through Canada was easy, hardly a soul within a fifty mile radius around us the whole way. My senses were more keen than hers still, so she hadn't noticed any human scent, mercifully. She had remained completely still for almost the entire trip. I was desperately curious to know what she was thinking. I couldn't really tell when we had passed through Canada into Alaska, but I knew we were still headed in the right direction. I caught the scent of the others and shook Bella gently, though it wasn't necessary. She could smell them too.

"We're almost there, love." She shifted in my arms and looked back at me.

"Oh…okay, umm…do I look okay?" I chuckled at her.

"Yes, Bella, you're beautiful as always." I slowed down to a jog. "Why do you ask?" I already knew the answer. Alice couldn't keep her discussion with Bella about the Denali sisters out of her mind before we had left.

"Well…Alice said…that one of the women there…." She was struggling, and though it was adorable, I relieved her of the words."You're worried Tanya won't think of you as threat. That she'll keep trying to 'seduce' me." I chuckled again. Her insecurities were unfounded. She nodded sheepishly.

"Bella…will you ever see yourself clearly? Even if Tanya was the most beautiful vampire in the world, it wouldn't matter to me. I love _you_." I pulled her in, kissing her with more passion than I'd allowed myself while she was human. She seemed to notice the difference, wrapping an arm around my neck, and tangling the other hand into my hair, pulling me closer. I wanted to continue, but I broke away. Her expression when I stopped made me want to pull her back and continue to assault her lips, But I sighed and resisted, choosing to instead set her on her feet beside me.

"Bella…they can smell us too…if we don't get there soon, they might think something happened to us. I laughed again and she smiled.

"Okay fine…we'll continue this later." We hurried up to the Denali sister's property.

It was rather expansive, like our home in Forks. Permanent. The acreage around the cabins was also meant to keep out curious outsiders. I heard Bella gasp next to me.

"It's gorgeous." Was all she could say as we made out way up to the main cabin.. It was two stories, large, by human standards. The three of them were standing out on their front porch, waiting for us. I smiled at them and waved, pulling Bella a bit closer to me. Tanya was the first to come forward, arms open in welcome. She hugged me first and I felt Bella tense up. She quickly released me and hugged Bella as well. Her eyes widened.

"So, this is your mate, Edward? Why she's absolutely lovely." She stepped back a bit and looked to me. I heard her thoughts ring out. _No, really Edward, I mean it…she's beautiful. _I thought I could hear regret tinge her thoughts. I smiled at her still. Tanya was so caring and genuine.

Her sisters approached soon after, each hugging me, but not quite so bold as Tanya to embrace a newborn. Kate looked from us to the guest cabin on the west side of the property.

"Would you like us to show you your accommodations? She laughed brightly. "I'm not sure it will be big enough once the others arrive, but it should be more than enough room for the two of you." I saw Bella smile and nod awkwardly.

"Yes, Kate…we've had a long run, that would be wonderful." Tanya and Kate began to walk to the cabin, I noticed Irina head back to the main house silently. When we had almost arrived, I turned to Tanya.

"What's wrong with Irina? She's acting differently…." Tanya answered me quietly, as if her sister would hear, which she probably could.

"Well…you knew Laurent?" I nodded. I preferred not to think of him or his ties to James, the monster who had almost succeeded in turning Bella over a year ago. I cringed at the similarities we now shared. "Well…Irina and him connected when he arrived here. They really bonded and I thought he would stay for good, but he just…left suddenly…almost a week ago. Irina was devastated. She hasn't said much since he left. I think it hurt her to see how close you and Bella are, so soon after…well, you know…" She smiled at me weakly and I nodded, understanding. Kate piped up.

"Well, here it is. I know it's not as big as your house in Forks, but it should do for now." She smiled and unlocked the front door for us.

"No, really, Kate…Tanya, it's perfect…thank you so much for the hospitality." I took my backpack from Bella's shoulder and walked up the steps with her.

"We're going to go hunting tomorrow morning, if you'd like to join us?" Tanya said as they were leaving.

"Okay, we'll see if Bella is up to it tomorrow." They nodded and left back to their own house. I picked her up with one arm and carried her over the threshold. She broke her silence then.

"You didn't have to make me sound so fragile…." I looked at her, confused, she continued. "_we'll see if Bella is up to it tomorrow_…" She mocked me and I chuckled at her.

"Well…you're still so new at hunting. I didn't know if you'd want to go with them."

"Well…I…maybe you're right…" She sighed and I hugged her closer.

"It's perfectly fine, Love…you'll get the hang of it soon enough."

She smiled and kissed me as I set down the backpacks. I took her in both my arms then, deepening the kiss, pulling her as close as I could, feeling her soft body mold to mine. The feeling was exquisite. Suddenly, my mind was flooded with memories from earlier. The encounter with Jacob floated to the front. I had the sudden urge to claim her. To make her mine. She lifted herself up onto my body, wrapping her long legs around my waist. I groaned into her mouth. She took it as encouragement. Could she sense my desire? She paused for a moment, pulling a fraction of an inch away from my mouth. She whispered to me, her tone seductive, whether intentional or not.

"Now, Edward. I need you right now." I nodded. That was the only decent action I could manage. I got a more firm grasp on her, placing my hands under her rear, and proceeded to the back of the cabin, where the master bedroom was.

There was a bed in the room, for looks if nothing else. It was a prop, of course, but a very appreciated one at the moment, though I would have had my way with her in a tree right now if I had no other choice. I flopped her down on the soft, goose feather comforter and pressed myself into her. She let out a soft moan, increasing my arousal ten-fold. She pushed her nimble body back up to meet mine. Clothing suddenly became a barrier I couldn't deal with. I pulled her sweaters from her body, tossing them to the side and slid jeans to the floor. She had already taken care of her boots before I had noticed. I stood for a moment, staring at her. Reveling in the beauty of her whole body. Had Alice foreseen this? These undergarments didn't seem like Bella's usual taste. I didn't care.

"Bella…God, Bella…you're so beautiful…" I breathed, barely a whisper, but I knew she heard me. She smiled at me, lust filled her eyes. I leaned in and kissed her again. The feeling of her lips against mine was like a drug. I ran my hand up he side, stopping short of her breast. She cried out, arching her back towards me.

"May I…?" I moved to unclasp her bra.

"You'd better." The menace in her tone was purely playful, at least I thought so, but if I stopped now, who knew what she might do to me. I slowly pulled her bra away, tossing it down with her other cloths. I lightly rubbed my thumb over the most sensitive spot and she gasped in pleasure. She lifted her hips up eagerly to meet mine. I pressed down in return and drew out another lovely noise from her.

"This isn't even close to fair…" She managed to gasp out between kisses. "You still have all your cloths on…" I followed her eyes down to my fully clothed body. I smirked and went to remove my own sweater, she grabbed my hands and flipped me over. I couldn't help but notice the alluring way her breasts moved, now unrestrained. Her newborn strength allowed her to restrain me one handed with ease. She used the other to literally rip my wool sweater from my body. She growled in response to the plain white undershirt that greeted her beneath. I chuckled at her. The garment was in shreds before I could open my mouth to protest. "There now. That's a bit a better…but something still seems to be in the way…" She smirked and softly brushed my arousal through my jeans. I inhaled sharply and she giggled in response. Why did she have to be such a tease? She tugged at my belt gingerly, suddenly seeming to become shy again.

"Edward..I" She paused, leaning back off me onto her heels. I groaned at the loss of contact.

"I don't know what I'm doing…" She smiled at me tentatively and I returned it.

"And you think I do? We'll figure this out together Bella…there's no one else in the world I'd rather experience this with." She flashed another bright smile at me as her dainty hands flew back to my belt, quickly undoing it and pulling down both my pants and underwear in one fluid motion. She tossed them aside and they landed on the floor next to her bra.

Then I heard the inevitable gasp as she saw me…all of me…bare to the world. I leaned up on my elbows and smirked.

"Don't like what you see, Love?" I feigned disappointment.

"No…I-I mean…yes. I do. Your body…it's…magnificent." I smiled genuinely and pulled her body back onto mine. I lifted up her hair and whispered in her ear.

"Not nearly as magnificent as you are, my love." She sighed into my chest and I had decided that we had waited long enough. Taking control back, I flipped her onto her back and straddled her. She moaned at the careful contact I made.

"You have no idea how long I've been waiting to touch you this way Bella…to feel worthy to touch you." I stroked her sides gently up and down with my fingers as I spoke. She writhed underneath me. I continued to arouse her with my words. "I'm going to make you feel so much pleasure Bella…you won't even be able to remember your name." She moaned again and pressed her center up to meet my own heated arousal. I groaned.

"Then _do it_ Edward." She bit her lip in the most seductive way and I lost it. One hand flew back up to her perfectly round breasts and the other gently slid between her legs, quickly doing away with her underwear. She cried out again. I stroked the lips, softly at first, then found the sensitive area at the front. I flicked at it, testing her reaction. She nearly screamed. This must have been what my brothers had talked about. The pleasure center of the female body. I played with it more, rubbing it between my fingers while still caressing her breasts.

"More, Edward…I need more…" I plunged two fingers into her heated core and again she screamed in pleasure. I had only a vague idea of what he was doing, but judging by her reaction I had to be doing _something_ right. I had been most unfortunate in my decades of unnatural life to experience the lustful thoughts of almost everyone I spent any considerable amount of time near, but it had yielded one positive result: I had some slight idea of what to do to please Bella now. Using two fingers, I stroked her soft core. She was squirming underneath me, moaning over and over in pleasure. I was barely able to cling to my senses as she begged me to go faster. I obliged without hesitation, increasing the pace of my strokes, still coming back to rub her sensitive nerve, just enough to send her screaming to orgasm. My name fell from her lips like liquid gold. Dripping with lust, love, desire, need, and a few other emotions I couldn't quite place.

"Edward…oh god…that was…""Magnificent?" I finished her sentence. She regained her composure quickly and giggled, pushing slightly at my shoulder. "Oh, no…I'm not even close to done with you yet, love." She feigned fright and backed up from me, crawling towards the headboard. I growled softly and tackled her to the bed again. I planted soft kisses all over her body. Her skin was delectable.

I pressed my body against hers, molding every curve of mine to her own. She stifled another giggle and looked up at me.

"I think there's something you need to take care of Edward…" I smirked and she ground her hips against my erection. I let out another moan, encouraging her.

"Bella…do you want to…" I felt suddenly embarrassed by what I was asking, but she cut me off mercifully.

"Yes…god, yes…Edward…I have to feel you."

_Ohhhhh…..I know, I know…you all hate me right now, but I promise the next chapter will be up ASAP, so don't fret. The more reviews you leave, the faster I will put up the next chapter…because I am evil._


	10. Loss

Okay...Chapter ten, as promised. Please please please review!

_(Bella's POV) _

That was all it took for him. He pushed me onto my back and I gladly complied. My legs gently fell to either side of me and I looked up to him. His breathe hitched softly. So quiet, my new sense of hearing almost missed it, I heard him whisper 'beautiful' over and over as he gazed at my body. He lowered his mouth to plant careful kisses on my legs, my stomach, everywhere but where I wanted him to be. I sighed. I didn't like this carefulness in our intimacy. It made me feel so…human. Something I didn't want to pretend I was anymore. I growled at him softly.

"Don't be so gentle, Edward. I can handle you, I promise." His expression changed from one of concern to excitement. As if he was just remembering…I was unbreakable. He chuckled a bit.

"I had no idea you liked it rough Bella." I could tell he was joking. I had no idea what I liked yet. I did know that I liked whatever he did to me.

He pressed his body into mine again. I could feel his length resting on my stomach. I sighed. My patience was wearing thin.

"Edward, please…!" I moaned and arched into him.

"Bella…I love you…are you sure you're ready for this?"

"Yes, I am…I love you too…I want this…with you, only with you." My words sounded like a mantra as he finally prepared himself to enter me. He slipped his hand back down between my legs, stroking me again. Getting me ready for him. I couldn't help but be excited. I had wanted this kind of intimacy with Edward for so long that it hurt. Every time he touched me, I was reminded of how he would _not _touch me. I vaguely remembered feeling rather rejected the several times I had tried to push his boundaries as a human. He had said it was for my own protection, and I did believe him, but it didn't soothe those feelings.

But now, I was getting exactly what I had wanted. It proved to only cement my love for him. I was abruptly pulled from my thoughts as he carefully entered me. He went slow. Too slow. I slid my hands down to rest on his rear, pushing him forward, encouraging him. He smiled at me and I was drawn in by his piercing eyes as they made contact with mine. He held my gaze as he settled into me, and I adjusted to him.

"Alright, love?" He whispered to me, pausing his movements.

"Yes, Edward…don't stop now…please." He smirked at me and drew himself out slightly before thrusting back in with new fervor.

"I had no intentions of stopping…" He trailed off into a moan as his hips met mine. I let out a satisfied moan to match his. He began to quicken his pace as I let out intermittent gasps and whimpers of pleasure. Letting out a groan, he stopped suddenly, his breath ragged and eyes wide.

"Edward, are you alrig-" I was cut off by his searing kiss. I moaned into his mouth, trying to express my displeasure for his stopping. Before I could say another word, he had flipped me onto my stomach, my legs dangling slightly over the huge bed. He was inside me again, picking up the pace he had left off at. My mind was dizzy, but I had no objection to this new position. It was like he was filling my body in a completely different way. I screamed his name in pure ecstasy, ripping up the sheets of the bed as I struggled to keep myself grounded. I lifted myself up to meet him again and again. His pace was unbelievable, even for a vampire. If I was human, I surely would have been split in two by now. I smiled to myself, he really was treating me as an equal now, not holding himself back.

"Harder, Edward…I'm so close…" I could feel the familiar sensation from earlier building up inside me again. Coiling like a spring, ready to explode. I wondered if he felt it too. He answered my unspoken question.

"Oh, God…Bella, so am I." He sped up even more and drove into me three more times before I felt my muscles tighten, my second orgasm washing over my body. I screamed out his name, lurching forward slightly at the force of his movement. I felt Edwards' release right after mine. He collapsed on top of me leaning over me to whispered in my ear.

"I love you Isabella…so much." I smiled and flipped our positions. I now straddled him, still connected, looking deep into his amber eyes. I leaned down and pressed my forehead to his, whispering to him.

"I love you too, Edward. And that, by the way, was absolutely amazing." He chuckled and lifted his hands to rest on my hips. "What was with the ah…sudden position change?" I questioned him with a hint of amusement. He looked back at me sheepishly.

"Well…I don't really know. I just felt so overwhelmed. I wanted you in every way all at once." His lips turned out the crooked smile I loved and I laughed softly at him. "Did…ah, did you like it?" He suddenly seemed uneasy.

"Are you kidding? It was fantastic. I can't wait to see what else you have in mind for us." That brought his smile back and he sat up, pulling me to sit on his lap.

"You want to find out right now, love?" he crooned into my ear before flicking his tongue against the lobe. I smirked, grabbed him by his shoulders and pulling him into another breathless kiss.

I wondered briefly if the Denali sisters could hear us from their cabin on the other side of the property. Then I realized they probably could, and that I didn't care. Making love with Edward was unbelievable. Like no other experience I'd ever had in either of my lives. I would never get tired of his kiss, his touch, his wonderful body. And he was mine. We had claimed each other in the most basic and instinctual way, but it felt more right than anything else ever had. Our first night as lovers continued on in absolute bliss. I didn't know how long we were at each other, but when the first hints of sunlight sparkled through the pines outside our window, we both decided that we should make ourselves presentable to our hospitable hostesses.

Just as we had finished pulling on fresh cloths and trying to make our room look somewhat respectable, we heard a knock on the front door. Edward made his way to answer it as I was pulling on my left boot. As soon as he opened the door, a wave of new scents hit me all at once. First, and most prominent, was that of Kate's. She smelled like rosemary with a distinct woodsy aroma. I inhaled and picked out the scent of pines and a herd of deer in the forest, not far off. Then I zeroed in on one I wasn't expecting. This smell was different. Bad. Wolf. I scowled as I walked to meet Edward at the door. His expression was similar. I looked at Kate, and her nose was wrinkled as if she'd just smelled sour milk.

"You um…you have a visitor Bella…" She trailed off, turning to look off too the east of the cabin. In the distance, I could make out a hulking shape among the trees. Jacob. He was barely visible, even with our superb eyesight, because of the space he had put between himself and the cabins.

"We tried to tell him to leave. That this was private property, but damn, is he stubborn! He refused to go until we agreed to let him see you. Stupid dogs…" Kate ended in a mutter, turning to Edward. "Sorry, Edward…if you need us, we'll be out hunting…probably all day, until that awful smell is gone…" With that she gave us a weak smile, turned on her heel and ran to join the tiny figures that I could only assume were Tanya and Irina almost a mile to the west. Then I looked up at Edward, his face was tense, the scowl replaced with a look of concern.

"You don't have to speak to him, Bella." He gripped my hand. "I can go and take care of this. I will make him leave you be if that is what you wish." I thought for a moment. As much as I was angry at him for the horrible things he had said to me, I still loved Jacob, even the slightest bit. I had long ago forgiven him for accidentally attacking me, but it seemed easier for all of us for me to keep up the façade of hatred. I knew we could never be friends now, and to be truthful, I was still ashamed that I had left him for Edward without a second thought. I hadn't even apologized, or given any kind of explanation. Part of me knew that he knew. That he expected me to turn tail and run back into Edward's waiting arms if he returned. Maybe that was why he was so anxious and angry when he arrived at my house that fateful day. He had caught Edward's scent. He knew I had spoken to him. And he knew it was over. I felt a wave of guilt wash over me. I had made my decision. I would talk to Jacob, one more time. Set things straight, apologize even. Then hopefully, he would move on and we would both have peace.

"No, Edward…It's okay. I owe it to him, to talk…just one more time…" He looked down at me, incredulous.

"Bella…how can you? After the terrible things he said to you?"

"I know…but, I realize now…that I left him…without any kind of explanation. He deserves that much from me." I looked down, unable to keep his gaze.

"What he deserves is nothing less than what he did to you, Bella." I felt his fists clench and release, speaking through gritted teeth.

"No. If you let yourself lose control and kill him, then you're no better than he is." Did I just say that? I felt like I was betraying both of them at the same time. Edward only nodded silently.

"I'm going to do this. At least see what he has to say." With that, I took off east towards the forest edge, where Jacob was waiting. Edward caught up with me in two quick strides and grasped my hand. I smiled up at him.

"Don't worry…you've already won." He smiled back at me and pulled me closer."I know, love…I just don't want him to hurt you anymore. Words are powerful things." Nothing more passed between us as we made our way slowly to Jacob. He was standing against a tall cedar, arms crossed against his grizzly chest. His face was a carefully maintained mask. He was trying to look intimidating, I thought. It might have worked, had I still been human.

But now, fear was not the most prevalent emotion that coursed through me. I stopped in front of him, twenty feet or so away, making sure to keep a good distance between us. He kept his eyes locked on me, not even glancing to Edward.

"He's trying to block his thoughts from me…this ought to be interesting…" Edward whispered to me so fast his lips barely moved. I had heard it clearly, but I knew Jacob had not. A scowl settled itself on his face.

"So, Jacob. What do you have to say to me? It had better be good, and quick…you're embarrassing me in front of our hostesses." I looked at him sternly. Not unlike the parental looks Renee used to attempt to give me. They had always failed. Jacob scoffed.

"Who? Those annoying leech bitches? They'll get over themselves." Edward growled softly, I could tell he did not like Jacob insulting those he considered to be family.

"Do not insult our friends, Jacob…just say what you came here to say." A new look of resolve came over him as he retrained his eyes on mine. Then his face faltered. His thoughts must have betrayed him, because before he had time to speak, Edward let out a snarl next to me.

"You will not lay one hand on Bella, you unimaginable bastard. Not while I have breathe in my body." He had taken a protective step forward, and I immediately wondered what had transpired between them mentally.

"What the hell? How did you- ?" I had almost forgotten, Jacob did not know about Edward's special ability. He collected himself quickly and continued. "It's not your choice to make, parasite." Jacob seemed to sputter out the words, still confused over how Edward had known. "Bella would never consider it…" I was annoyed now."Consider _what_ Edward?" He inhaled sharply before looking back at me.

"Jacob wants to kill you, Bella." My eyes widened a bit. I was sure my mouth hung open in an unattractive fashion. Before I could answer, Jacob cut me off.

"I don't mean it like that…I just wanted you to know there's another option, Bella. You don't have to be a monster like him. I could end if for you." I stared at him, disbelieving.

"I'm not sure I understand here, Jacob. Are you threatening me? Or offering to help me commit suicide?" Edward had taken his place beside me again, slipping one arm around me, pulling me close. The contact felt good, because at that moment, I felt utterly disconnected from everything else.

"Bella…just listen. I know you don't want to be this. You don't want to kill innocent people. I know you. You are…or at least, you used to be a good person. I don't want to see you become a monster like them." He gestured briefly at Edward. "I'm the only creature besides another bloodsucker that can end your life…if that's what you want to call it. I would make it quick, Bella. You wouldn't feel anything. You wouldn't have to live like this…" Now I was livid.

"For you information Jacob Black…we are not 'monsters'…" I made sure to use the plural, including myself in his definition. "We do not kill innocent people…we don't kill people at all! And maybe you should have thought about all of this before you decided to rearrange my organs!"

My breath had quickened and I felt Edward clutch me tighter, trying to comfort me. Jacob exploded at me.

"Damn it Bella! I've already apologized for that! There was nothing I could do. What more do you want from me?!" I took in a sharp breath, trying to compose myself before speaking. I would have to be harsh. I would have to break his heart.

"I want you to leave me alone, Jacob. I don't want you to 'end my misery', I don't want anything from you. You've done enough damage. I don't love you. I don't ever want to see you again."

I instantly regretted my words as I saw his face fall. His eyes did not meet mine when he responded.

"I know you don't anymore….but did you even love me when we were together?" Was he a masochist? Did he want me to break his heart even more? I let out a resigned sigh. This conversation had not at all gone in the way I had hoped it would only minutes before. But that was before he had offended my family and offered to kill me. My voice was calm now.

"No. I didn't. I never loved you like you wanted me to. You could never hold the place in my heart that Edward does. I loved you like a friend…a brother even, but never a lover. I only agreed to date you to get you off my back, to make Charlie happy. That's all." I knew I had hurt him, but he didn't let it show on his face. Edward remained still beside me, his face a stoic mask.

I took another breathe and continued.

"You deserve someone who can love you fully Jacob. I could never do that. Someday you will imprint, and your love for me will only be a memory. I am sorry. I'm sorry I lied to you, and I'm sorry things had to end so badly between us, but in truth Jacob, you gave me what I really wanted. I _wanted _this life. I wanted to be able to be equal with Edward, and in a roundabout way…you made that possible. Thank you for that."

Jacob had retreated a bit into the forest, but he turned back to me.

"I'll just ask you one more time, Bella….is this what you really want. Is _he_ what you really want?"

My answer was simple and sure.

"Yes." He sighed and turned his back on me.

"Fine then. I'll leave now. You won't ever have to see me again, I promise." With that, my former best friend had taken off into the forest, several moments later, he exploded into a cloud of fur and was gone.

Gone.

Forever.

I couldn't help but shudder at the sudden sense of loss I felt. Then Edward pulled me tight against him. I let out a tearless sob into his chest.

"I'm so sorry, Bella. I didn't want you to have to go through that." He held me close and rubbed soft circles on my back. And I let myself be lost in his scent. In the feel of his touch. Realizing that I wasn't about to move any time soon, He lifted me up into his arms and cradled me, walking us slowly back to our cabin. He laid me down on the couch in the living room, sitting down at my head. I scooted up a bit and rested my head on his thighs.

"That was so awful. How could I be so heartless?" I looked up to his waiting eyes. His fingers intertwined in my hair. I couldn't quite place the emotion that was playing over his face.

"No, Bella…he didn't exactly make this easy on you. God…when I heard what he was going to suggest to you in his head…I didn't know if I would be able to keep myself from ripping his limbs off…" The hint of anger in his voice began to fade as he continued. "But then I thought, only for a fraction of a second, that maybe what he was offering would be what you want." I was a bit shocked.

"Edward…did you really think I'd rather be dead than be with you?" His lips turned down and his he closed his eyes.

"I didn't think you'd want to be with me like this…I forced you into this life, Bella." I sat up and faced him, placing both my hands on his cheeks.

"I'm going to tell you this one more time, Edward, so listen carefully. I. Do. Not. Blame. You. Okay? I love you, more than anything. I _wanted_ this life. Did you not just hear me tell Jacob that? I would give anything to be with you. Forever. The only way I would have ever accepted Jake's offer was if I didn't have _you_." I stared into his soft amber eyes with my crimson ones. I seemed to drive the point home. He took my hands from his cheeks and held them.

"I love you too, Bella…but I think it might take awhile for me to forgive myself." He looked away from me and I sighed.

"I know." I cuddled up to him in the leather sofa and rested my head on his chest. Not a moment later, I felt his cell phone vibrate in his pocket.


	11. Revelation

(Edward's POV)

I groaned as I felt the cell phone go off. I didn't feel like talking to my family right now, but I knew that if they were calling, it must be important. Bella shifted off me as I reached into my pocket to pull out the phone. I looked at it briefly. Alice. I flipped it open.

"Alice? What's wrong?" I heard a sharp intake of breath from the other end of the line. It almost sounded as if she had been sobbing.

"Charlie is dead, Edward…" I didn't have time to respond before she had started talking again, speaking at lightening speed. "It was Victoria, Victoria and Laurent. She's been looking for Bella. She wanted to kill her, to take revenge for James…" My mind was working at an unbelievable pace, trying to process the information and listen to Alice simultaneously. "She followed Bella's scent to Charlie's house. I don't know why they did it. Maybe she was trying to provoke Bella…I just- No! Edward, stop her!" Her movements were so fast I almost didn't see it as she flew past me on the way to the door. I dropped the phone, Alice was still yelling frantically on the other end. I followed her, taking off across the lawn between the cabin and the woods.

_Is she alright, Edward? Do you need assistance?_ Tanya appeared on the front porch of the main cabin, an anxious look on her face. I shook my head vigorously, speeding up. I had lost sight of Bella, she was too deep in the woods. As I hit the tree line, I heard the most heartbreaking sound in my unnaturally long life. It was Bella. She had let out an anguished cry into the forest. It rung through the trees, echoing off them. Flocks of birds rose from the branches, frightened.

I caught up to her quickly. She was kneeling on the soggy earth, her hands clasped over her face. I knelt down beside her, wrapping my arms around her. She looked up at me, her eyes were expressionless, but I could see the fire burning deep inside them.

"I'm going to kill her, Edward…" Her voice was calm, collected…at first, then she lost it. "I'm going to fucking _kill_ her!" She was seething. I didn't know what to say, so I said nothing. Then she was on her feet again and running. I followed her just as quickly, staying a few steps behind. I had an idea of what she was doing.

Not a whole minute later, she had found what she was seeking, a herd of deer. She lunged and killed three of the oblivious animals in succession, letting them drop to the forest floor. She then proceeded to drain them. She stood, panting for air, but not from exhaustion. Her arm wiped away the remaining blood, then she turned to me. I went to her, her silent pleas beckoning me. I hugged her tightly.

"I wish I could cry…I have all this pent up emotion and no way to let it out…"

"I know, Love…I know how you feel. I picked her up and walked back to the cabin, with her slung bridal style in my arms.

"We have to go back you know." She whispered into my chest."Yes…I know. Victoria must be destroyed." I tired not to let it show, but I was just as outraged as she was. Not only for the loss of Charlie, but at the idea of losing Bella to that monster as well. If I had never returned, Victoria would have gotten her.

I took her back to the main cabin, Tanya, Kate, and Irina were standing on the porch, waiting for us, anxious looks still plastered on their faces. I smiled at them in an attempt to lighten the mood. Bella wiggled in my grasp, then she hissed at me.

"Put me down! Don't make me seem so weak." I complied immediately, setting her down, but maintaining a grasp on her hand.

"There's been an unexpected emergency back in Forks…Alice just called me, they want us to return home right away. I'm sorry our stay was so short…but we'll be back soon." They must have understood our urgency, because they only nodded and smiled at us. "Thanks again for your hospitality, you're all welcome at our home whenever you want to visit, as I'm sure you know.

"Oh, Edward…stop with the formalities, you're like a brother to us." Tanya said as she stepped forward. She embraced me tightly and then turned to Bella. "It was wonderful to meet you, Bella. I only hope we can get to know each other next time." Then they hugged and Tanya went back up to the cabin. Kate and Irina waved at us from the porch and followed.

"Wait here, Love." Bella nodded and I dropped her hand and took off to the guest cabin. I decided that I should at least grab my phone before we left, in case our family tried to contact us again before we got back to Forks. I wouldn't bring anything else with us. There was no need. Hopefully we would be able to return soon, after this mess with Victoria and Laurent was sorted out. Even with the extra capacity my vampire brain held, I was still having trouble processing all that had happened in the last few days. We hadn't even been away from Forks for twenty-four hours before tragedy had struck in Bella's life again.

How much more pain could one person endure before they broke? But she wasn't just a person anymore, she was a vampire. One of us. She would have to live with Charlie's tragic death for the rest of her existence. I knew she would disagree, but I felt like this was all my fault. I had failed to protect her, by failing to protect her former family. It seemed I was only able to cause pain in her life. For the briefest moment, I regretted my decision to return to her. But no, she had never gotten over my absence. She had only sought out Jacob in desperation. She still wanted me, and I would be a fool to turn my back on her now. Now, when she needed me so much. And who was I kidding? As if I had the strength to leave her again. Now it was different. She was a vampire, and I knew she could track me to the ends of the earth if I ever left again. And I knew that she would. Besides, leaving wouldn't solve anything.

I had turned her, taken her mortality, and promised to stay with her. She had given up everything to be with me for eternity, she had give up her life. Her love was so intense, so pure, so strong, that it hurt me to think of life without her. Her existence was a shining beacon of hope and light in the ceaseless night that was my own pitiful 'life'. I continued to pondered my thoughts as I reached for my cell phone which had fallen several feet away from the couch in my earlier haste to catch up with Bella. I looked at the screen. Fifteen missed calls from Alice. I sighed to myself. As I was about to dial her number, the phone vibrated in my hand. Typical Alice. I pressed the green button, accepting the call, and lifted the phone to my ear.

"God, where the hell have you been, Edward? I've been calling for nearly and hour!" She sounded exasperated.

"I'm sorry. I was busy chasing down Bella in the forest. Shouldn't you have seen that?" She sighed heavily over the phone before answering me.

"No, actually…I didn't see it. It's been bothering me, but the longer you two stay away, the less I see of Bella's future. The last thing I remember catching was last night, when you two were, well…you know." My thoughts were muddled. How could Bella's future be disappearing? She was safe. For now at least, and I wouldn't let anything change that.

"Carlisle thinks she might have an ability. He thinks she might have the ability to shield other vampires' powers. She's always been able to block you, but maybe that extended to the rest of us after you turned her. In any case, I want the two of you home as soon as possible, so we can keep a closer eye on her. Make sure she's really safe. Not to mention we have to track down Victoria. She seems to be taking advantage of the treaty we have with the wolves. She's learned where the line that neither side will cross is. She zig-zags between La Push Territory and ours. And the wolves aren't being any help. They're angry with us. They think we have something to do with Jacob's disappearance." I cut her off then.

"We saw him today. Earlier this morning. He wanted to talk to Bella again. He offered to kill her, so she wouldn't have to be a monster like us…" I growled, the acid dripping in my voice was obvious and Alice gasped on the other end of the line.

"That mongrel…How could he even suggest such a thing? I bet Bella was furious." I smirked slightly. My sister knew Bella well.

"Yes…she told him off. She didn't even need any help from me. But, Alice you never got to finish explaining what happened to Charlie." I heard her take in another unneeded breathe before she spoke again.

"Yes…well, Carlisle was at the hospital this morning, of course, he was there when the ambulance brought Charlie in. They took him straight to the morgue. He was dead on arrival. Victoria didn't even drink him. She just…" Alice paused. I could tell this whole ordeal would be hard for her. She had taken an immediate liking to Charlie over the summer before we left Forks. "She just killed him. Broke his neck. I'll explain the rest when you two return. Carlisle said he wouldn't have suffered. If that will put Bella at any ease. I know this must be horribly difficult for her. "

I sighed and headed back to the door, Bella would be wondering what was keeping me, even though I'd only been gone a minute or two.

"It is…she seems better now, but she was very distraught earlier. We're getting ready to head back now, we've already explained to Tanya and the others. We should be back in seven or eight hours, I'll go as fast as I can." I heard Alice rise on the other end and move about the house.

"Okay, we'll be waiting for you." With that, the line went dead and I flipped the phone shut, slipping it into my front pocket. I hurried back to Bella to find her in exactly the same position I had left her in. I took her hand again and she lifted her eyes up to meet mine.

"It will be okay, Bella. We will find her, we will make her pay for what she's done." My love simply nodded and clasped my hand tighter. "Do you mind if I carry you back, Bella? It might be faster that way." She thought for another moment before nodding again and allowing me to lift her into my arms. I cradled her firm body to my equally hard chest. A part of me missed the warmth her body used to generate. When it was still alive. Now she was a cold, unchanging piece of stone, as I was. Sure, she was my equal now, in her eyes, but at what cost? How much more of her old life would she have to give up to be with me? Would Renee be next on Victoria's hit list if we failed to catch her soon? I shuddered at the thought. The action did not go unnoticed by Bella. She looked up at me, quizzically. I shook my head at her.

"It's nothing, Bella, I promise." I tried to give her a reassuring smile, but then I heard something that made me stop dead in my tracks.

_You're lying to me Edward Cullen._ I gasped and looked down at her. Her mouth had not moved. No audible words had passed between her gorgeous lips. she narrowed her eyes at me, but she obviously had no idea what had just transpired between us.

"Bella…how did you-…when did you-….I-I can read your thoughts." I blurted out, not really knowing how else to word it. Her now dulling crimson eyes widened. "Try it again, Bella. Think something. Concentrate." She nodded her head slightly and then closed her eyes. Her brow furrowed and I was suddenly hit with a new stream of thoughts.

_Edward, can you hear me? I don't know how I'm doing this…tell me if you can hear me…_

"Yes…I can, Bella…I can hear every word…." She gasped now too, looking utterly shocked.

"How?" Was all she could manage and I shook my head at her again.

"I have no idea, Love…but I promise we are going to figure it out, Carlisle will be able to help us."

I could only hope my words would be right. I could only hope that he would be able to tell us what was going on with Bella. With that thought, I took off again towards the wilderness and back towards Forks. Home


End file.
